Apparently, it's Christmas. Chig is escaping the madness. Here's your present, courtesy of Dutch 'bearband' Bearforce One. Ho ho ho(mo).

Labels: Bearforce One, Christmas, YouTube

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After two and a half years, Chig is going back here...



...to stay with...



Flying at 6am tomorrow. Goodnight!

Labels: holiday, Kyiv, PJ

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I know what you're thinking. 'What I really need to cheer myself up on this dull Friday is to watch the winner of Bulgaria's Music Idol singing Dolly and Whitney's finest moment in a Mariachi 'stroke' Serbian wedding band stylee with full brass band accompaniment'.

Wait no longer.

Not even Rhydian could carry this off. Sheer genius. No wonder she won. When do we get oompah band week on The X Factor?

I give you....Nevena Coneva!

Labels: Bulgaria, MusicIdol, NevenaConeva

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Auf Wiedersehen / Hej!

As of 19:00 tonight, Chig has finished working for his employer of the last five years.

There will now be a long weekend off.

On Tuesday, Chig will go back to the same office, with the same people, to do the same job, for the same salary...BUT WITHOUT THE MOBILE PHONE BENEFITS AND THE UNLIMITED, FREE MOBILE INTERNET! Waaaaaah! Sob, sob.

And relax.

For we have been TUPEed. Sold off. Sub-contracted en masse. Instead of working for the UK arm of a German-owned multinational, we will now be working for the UK arm of a Swedish multinational, contracting our services back to the UK arm of the German multinational. Without the phone benefits.

Time will tell whether or not this proves to be a good move.

Labels: work

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Labels: C4, SecretMillionaire, TerryGeorge, TV

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The woman who did the 'mind the gap' announcements on the tube (an underground transportation system in that there London) has been sacked.

According to this BBC article, she "has worked for the Underground since 1999". You thought she just popped into a recording studio eight years ago and said three words, didn't you? But no, she has been doing it live all that time, and it hasn't been without its consequences. The story says she is 36, but as you can see from the BBC's picture (left), the pressure of saying that line over and over again for eight years has turned her into a 60 year-old. How sad.

Labels: EmmaClarke, London, LU

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Labels: SecretMillionaire, TerryGeorge, TV

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I wasn't seeing things. Here's the caption which must have annoyed the whole of Wearside on Saturday's X Factor:

Labels: TV, X Factor

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Labels: C4, SecretMillionaire, TerryGeorge, TV

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From Andorra La Vella to Zagreb, via Astana, Kyiv and Minsk. These are the travels that await the England football team after this afternoon's draw for the qualifying groups for the 2010 FIFA World Cup in South Africa. No one will want to be the England manager after this, unless they are keen on collecting Air Miles. With Croatia and Ukraine in England's group, it's going to be a struggle on the field anyway.

My guess is that, with the exception of Zagreb, most of the England football team don't have a clue where these places are. (They probably won't go to Andorra La Vella anyway, as the last Andorran 'home' match against England was played in Barcelona, to allow for a bigger crowd.)

None of these travels to the East look easy, either because of distance or the quality of the teams. Whether England will relish drawing Croatia again, just four days after they put us out of Euro 2008, remains to be seen. (Andorra were also with Croatia and England in the Euro qualifying group, so there's a certain air of familiarity with Europe Group 6, as drawn in Durban today.)

Compare this with Scotland's group, which features nothing further East than FYR Macedonia, their other opponents being Iceland, Norway and the Netherlands.

None of the five teams from the UK and Ireland have been drawn together, and the six countries who previously made up Yugoslavia have also been drawn into six different groups. What are the chances of those two things happening? It almost looks suspicious...

Grudge matches

Looking further afield, today's World Cup draw has thrown up the local derby to end all local derbies; North Korea and South Korea are in the same group! Blimey! This puts Sweden v. Denmark in Europe Group 1 and the aforementioned Iceland v. Norway in Europe Group 9 into perspective.

I've decided that Europe Group 3 should be named 'The Group of Geographical Confusion' as the Czech Republic and Slovakia are forced together again. Not only that, but Slovenia are also in this group with Slovakia, which will confuse the people who think they are the same country. (Even the Slovenian tourist authority's website used to acknowledge this confusion.)

In Europe Group 4, it will surely be expected that Germany and Russia will win all their games against the other four countries (Azerbaijan, Finland, Liechtenstein and Wales). The group winner will probably be decided on the two results between Germany and Russia themselves, but it matters in this competition, as it's only the group winners who go to South Africa automatically. The best eight (of nine) European runners-up will then play four play-offs to claim the last four European places.

On a personal level, I'm quite pleased with one of the countries that England have drawn, as I'm going there in a couple of weeks. It will give me something to talk about with the locals (language permitting). I wonder if you can guess where I'm going on holiday? (There won't be any lounging on any beaches.)

Photo (c) BBC News.

Labels: England, South Africa, World Cup 2012

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Dermot O'Leary made a surprising announcement tonight at the start of The X Factor. If it's true, it looks like the winner of this series won't be aiming for the Christmas Number One this year. He said the final takes place in four weeks' time, making it the 22nd of December and not the 15th; the date which would be necessary in order to register shop sales for the Christmas chart. (I thought there would be a double eviction soon, or the return of the three-act final, in order to cater for this.)

With Christmas Day on Tuesday 25th, the Christmas Number One will be announced on Sunday 23rd, meaning that an X Factor final on Saturday 22nd would have no impact at all, unless... unless...

Are they planning to take a massive gamble and release the winner's song as a download immediately after the programme? This would give two hours at the most for the song to outsell everything else from the last seven days before the midnight cut-off point for the chart week. However, if it sold at the same rate as Leona's download did in its first hour, it would be more than enough to top the charts.

Leona's single was released as a download after midnight last year, but it didn't matter because last year's final was on Saturday 16th December, giving a whole week of sales before she easily claimed the Christmas Number One on Christmas Eve.

If Dermot was right, this will add another twist to the annual race for the Christmas Number One, but he may be wrong. After all, last week he said the theme of today's show would be Motown, but that's been ditched in favour of love songs. Perhaps the X Factor people just don't know what they're doing?

This feeling will be heightened by the bemusing caption they put on screen tonight during Hope's travels back home. Did it really say, 'Sunderland, County of Durham'? For a start, it's called 'County Durham', not 'County of Durham'. More importantly, Sunderland isn't in it. It remains in the county called Tyne & Wear, unless I missed an announcement somewhere. A shocking mistake to make.

While I'm here... Rhydian gave a series-winning performance tonight, of one of my favourite songs ('Somewhere' from West Side Story), while Niki struggled with a few notes, especially near the start. I think Hope are in danger again tonight, after performing an unknown song (unless you're a Christina Aguilera fan), with some wavering vocals, despite what the judges said. (They can't hear a thing in the studio; we are in a much better position to hear the vocals on TV.) Surely Hope will be in the bottom two? However, it will probably be with Leon, in which case he may go, thereby keeping the girls in with a chance of winning, which is what some of the former contestants believe the programme-makers have wanted all along. (Ooh, it's a World of Chig exclusive!)

Labels: chart, Christmas, geography, Number One, X Factor

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WARNING: Contains material which may be offensive to people called Kevin.



Spot the difference.

At last, Australia has woken up and voted out Prime Minister John 'Penfold' Howard after an inexplicable eleven years and four (four!) terms. So far so good, but they have evicted the shrewish, whining accountant in favour of Prime Minister Kev. There's something about being called Kevin which just doesn't go with the words 'Prime Minister', isn't there? (I've realised that I have four friends and a relative called Kevin. I am now running for cover.)

As an aside, what does it say about the Commonwealth's opinion of Australia that they decided to continue with the Commonwealth Heads of Government Conference, currently taking place in Uganda, on the same day as the Australian election? Who is representing Australia at the conference? The Governor General?

Labels: Australia, Commonwealth, election, JohnHoward, KevinRudd, Penfold

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Starting on BBC Two tonight at 20:00 is a series called Arrange Me A Marriage. The regular reader (that's probably you) may remember that, back on 17 April this year, I asked here if anyone had watched the pilot. I also mentioned that I'd been "having an in-depth conversation with a television production company".

Four days later, on 21 April, I wrote this:

"Chig is away on location, filming with the BBC on a hush-hush TV project. (I'm making it sound more exotic than it really is, but it's absolutely true. If it goes any further, believe me you'll hear about it.)"

It can now be revealed that the programme we were filming was in fact Arrange Me A Marriage. It wasn't for my benefit though. (Maybe next series?!) It was my sister who had made it down to the last handful of subjects for the programme, in which an Asian marriage arranger, Aneela Rahman, uses friends, family and existing social networks in order to arrange a few dates and a possible relationship, to see if the arranged methods are any more successful than the random ways we often use to make these decisions in our real lives. That's the idea anyway.

A producer and a camerawoman from the production company came to my Mum's house on that lovely sunny day in April and filmed us at the kitchen table talking about my sister and her relationships. They also travelled quite a distance to other locations to film other friends and relatives. It was a strange experience, but it seemed to work quite well and we had a few ideas for what to do when the filming started on the real thing. However, the production company at that point was doing pre-filming with a few possible subjects, before showing the results to the BBC for them to decide which ones to proceed with for the series. We were optimistic, but in the end it came to a choice between my sister and someone else for the last slot and they went for someone else. An opportunity missed, for all of us. And you, dear reader, have been denied the opportunity of seeing my fizzog in horrible detail on your plasma screens and hearing my sinusitis-riddled mumblings about someone you don't even know.

Obviously I'd be interested to see how the series turned out without us when it starts tonight, but sadly it clashes with I'm A Celebrity. C'est la vie.

Labels: ArrangeMeAMarriage, TV

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Group E: Final table

P W D L F A GD Pts
1 Croatia 12 9 2 1 28 8 20 29
2 Russia 12 7 3 2 18 7 11 24
--------------------------------
3 England 12 7 2 3 24 7 17 23
4 Israel 12 7 2 3 20 12 8 23
5 FYR Macedonia 12 4 2 6 12 12 0 14
6 Estonia 12 2 1 9 5 21 -16 7
7 Andorra 12 0 0 12 2 42 -40 0


Next June, the footballers of England, Scotland, Wales, Northern Ireland and the Republic of Ireland have nothing to do.

Bring back the home internationals! (With the Republic of Ireland also included this time.) The campaign starts here.

PS. Out of eleven people in our office, not one person predicted a 2-3 win for Croatia tonight. This has saved our manager from having to buy a bottle of champagne.

Labels: Euro 2008, football

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It's Children In Need day and no doubt you've been glued to Celebrity Scissorhands like I have (or perhaps you have a life). I've found it very entertaining and as the whole point of the programme is to make money for charity, here's Friday's Celebrity Scissorhands challenge. Even though it's for charidee, it's really all about me, me, me of course. (It's my blog, so there.) So the question is...

Which three trainees in this year's Celebrity Scissorhands academy have I met before?
(When I say met, I mean actually had a conversation with, as there's one other who I've seen in the flesh but not spoken to.)

If anyone guesses the correct three before the Children In Need programme ends tonight, I'll give a tenner to the appeal via this page here. That may not seem a lot, but it's ten quid more than I've ever given them before. Actually, I take that back. I've probably bought every bloody Children In Need single that's ever been released, although I may have to draw the line at this year's snoozefest from the Spice Girls.

So, which three? No, I'm not giving you a list of all the trainees. Do your own research. :-)

Labels: Celebrity Scissorhands, challenge, charity, Children In Need

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Welcome back, Mr Brown. I wondered what you were up to.



I think I know what I'm doing for the next four weeks...
My second favourite boybander ever, ever, ever is in the jungle. Two friends are out in Oz, working on the programme. I'm hooked!

Labels: 5ive, I'm A Celebrity, J, Jason Brown, TV

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Nice to see the Council House done up tastefully for Remembrance Day today.

Labels: Armistice Day, Birmingham, Council House, poppies, Remembrance Sunday

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Last week's surprise rejects from The X Factor realised this morning that they will struggle as a five-piece, so they recruited an extra member. Futureproof become Futurepoof.



"Okay lads, here's the deal. One sixth of all future royalties and I'm all yours."

Labels: Futureproof, Nightingale Club, X Factor

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And we were doing so well.

I mean, the self-imposed 'no mention of the E word until December' rule was being strictly observed. It's usually Albania who set the ball rolling by choosing their Eu*ov*si*n song in their late December song festival. (It had been running for over forty years anyway, so when they joined Eu*ov*si*n in 2004, they decided to use the contest to pick their song and leave it in December. Who could blame them?)

This year though, we have been trying to ignore the fact that Iceland, for reasons best known to a handful of TV execs in Reykjavic, are already five weeks into their weekend heats to choose their song for Beograd/Belgrade.

Until this weekend, when this appeared. Welcome to 'Ho, ho, ho, we say hey, hey, hey' by Barði Jóhannsson. For some reason, this cannot be ignored. Brace yourself for the first World of Chig featured song of the (very long) Eurovision 2008 season. It's all downhill after this...

Labels: Barði Jóhannsson, Eurovision 2008, Iceland

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Some Channel 4 shows in which Chig has featured:

The Word
15-to-1
Sticky Moments with Julian Clary
Queer As Folk
Big Brother's Big Mouth

Actually, one of these is a lie. But which one?

Labels: birthday, channel 4

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It's not every day you go to a one hundredth birthday party. It's not often you go to a birthday party for a building either, but that's what Chig is doing this afternoon. Our local swimming baths, Moseley Road Baths in Balsall Heath, are 100 years old today. They were opened by the mayor on 30th October 1907, so today the current mayor of Birmingham is retracing the route taken by his predecessor and walking from Birmingham city centre, out to Balsall Heath. We'll be joining in. Then we'll be going to an afternoon tea dance opposite the pool.





This magnificent Edwardian building needs millions of pounds spent on it, because Birmingham City Council has neglected the basic structure for years. However, they are considering closing it instead, which just cannot be allowed to happen. Today's centenary celebrations are just the beginning of a year of events to raise the building's profile and hopefully save this local legacy.



Links:

The Victorian Society includes Moseley Road Baths in its list of the country's ten most endangered buildings, published earlier this month.

Friends of Moseley Road Baths - MySpace profile.

Friends of Moseley Road Baths - facebook group.

Moseley Road Baths on Wikipedia.

Labels: Balsall Heath, Birmingham, history, Moseley Road Baths

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It was a deliciously brilliant piece of timing for the BBC to show Matthew Pinsent's family history adventure tonight, on the day when the BBC itself is one of the main news stories, as people begin to digest the cutbacks announced yesterday. In 'Who Do You Think You Are?' tonight, BBC One played one of its trump cards, by showing just how brilliant BBC factual programming can be.

I've been hooked on WDYTYA? since it started (and this is the end of series four), but tonight's was one of the best. It sent shivers down my spine and made me very jealous that I have only traced my family tree back eight generations in one direction to one person born in the 1770s. I don't want to spoil the programme if you didn't watch Pinsent's story tonight, but let's just say he was able to go considerably further back and uncover some rather famous connections. (I haven't had a team of BBC researchers and genealogists to help me though, and he hasn't put in the hours at the Family Records Centre that I have, which is half the fun.) I strongly recommend you catch it when it's repeated. The repeats are currently running a few weeks behind the first showings (with Carol Vorderman's programme on after midnight tonight and Alistair McGowan's next week), but they're shown again, with signing, late on Thursday nights.

Pinsent's quest is the family history hunt to end them all, and will either encourage thousands more to start investigating their own family trees, or make people give up, because they know they will never...

No, enough, I'll say no more. Just look out for it when it's on again. If you are going to watch it, DON'T read this - it gives away too much information. If you happened to catch it tonight, what did you think?

Photo courtesy BBC.

Labels: BBC, family history, genealogy, Matthew Pinsent

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[17:35] Chig is currently listening to Five Live's commentary on the crucial Russia v. England European football qualifier. The BBC apologised for the sound quality before they handed over to their commentators in Moscow. They started the match commentating down their mobile phones, moving to a landline after about twelve minutes. They haven't explained why the Russians haven't provided proper broadcasting facilities. I'm sure we'll find out when the BBC team gets back home. In the meantime, we are having to strain to listen to commentary which sounds like it's coming from outer space, with cotton wool over the microphones.

All is not lost though. As several listeners have mentioned, it's just like the olden days. Football commentary always used to be like this when I was little, so I'm feeling quite nostalgic.

On the downside, England are losing 2-1, having taken an early lead on the artificial pitch.

UPDATE: England have lost, 2-1. There is now a very real chance that they won't be in Austria and Switzerland next year for the European Championships. The maths are complicated, but we may have to hope that Israel beat Russia and FYR Macedonia beat Croatia; two very unlikely results. Suddenly, despite the fact that there's not a drop of Scottish blood mingling with the English, French, Welsh and Irish blood in my veins (as far as I know), I'm feeling very Scottish. Off to watch their game with Georgia now. At least this one's on the telly.

Photo courtesy BBC News.

Labels: Euro 2008, football

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Eurovision fans are in shock today, not to mention most people in the Balkans. Toše Proeski (Тоше Проески), who represented the former Yugoslav republic of Macedonia in Eurovision 2004 in Istanbul, was killed at 06:25 (BST+CET) this morning in a car crash in Croatia, at the tragically young age of 26. It seems he was a passenger in a vehicle which crashed into the back of another. He was the only fatality. The driver and another passenger, Toše's manager, have survived the crash.



Toše and his dramatically presented song 'Life' (above) surprised quite a few people in 2004, by getting through the first ever Eurovision qualifier and finishing a reasonable 14th out of 24 in the final. More importantly, he was a multilingual megastar in the former Yugoslav countries, where this will be massive news today.

Our condolences to all involved with him.

Labels: Croatia, Eurovision 2004, FYR Macedonia, obituary, Toše Proeski

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It's been a bad 48 hours for the UK's Eurovision fans. On Sunday, Wogan was elevated to the status of cultural icon by well-meaning but ultimately batty Radio 2 listeners. This has probably extended his tenure on Eurovision by another five years, at least.

Today, we learn that Ronnie Hazlehurst has died. Not only was his name one of the most seen in TV credits of the 1970s, because he'd written the theme tunes, but he was also a Eurovision fixture. He was musical director for three Eurovisions and conducted the UK entry seven times. This clip, from Eurovision 1974 in Brighton, is possibly not Ronnie Hazlehurst's finest moment, but Katie Boyle does mention his name twice in the first minute, once in English and once in French. What more could anyone want?



Here's a better tribute. Hazlehurst is the one looking like Steed from the Avengers at the beginning of this 1977 Eurovision clip (Wogan-free version):

Labels: 1974, Eurovision, obituary, Ronnie Hazlehurst, Wogan

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Spurs 1-0 Villa
Spurs 1-1 Villa
Spurs 1-2 Villa
Spurs 1-3 Villa
Spurs 1-4 Villa
Spurs 2-4 Villa
Spurs 3-4 Villa

92nd minute: Spurs 4-4 Villa

Bloomin' heck!

Labels: Aston Villa, Premier League, Spurs

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The nation's favourite radio stations are both 40 years old today. In another life, I would probably have written loads about this, my Radio 1 calendars and taping of the charts every Sunday. However, due to a recently acquired Facebook addiction (seven days in and hopelessly hooked, until the next fad), a slight hangover and an invite out for a late Sunday lunch, I can't be bothered.

Look on the bright side. The hopeless Jerk and Jackoff leave the Radio 1 chart show next week, so we can start listening to it again from 14th October. Hurrah!

Labels: Radio 1, Radio 2

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Bugger.

Labels: Aston Villa, Carling Cup, embarrassment

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Congratulations are due to our chums down the road at Chig's second home, the Nightingale Club, who have scored a top forty hit single today in week one of their first release as a record label. Nightingale Records has been formed specially for the release of 'Beautiful Ones', the debut for boyband Billiam. (Catalogue number = NIGHTINGALE1.) The single was released last Monday (17th) and enters the chart today at #32. This seems quite impressive considering that;

(a) boybands aren't exactly flavour of the month these days
(b) it's a first release on a new label
(c) I haven't heard any mention of the single on TV or radio at all
(d) 'Billiam' is a really crap name

It seems that supporting Westlife on tour and doing loads of club PAs really can pay off. Oh, and getting your kits off for the gay mags.

Here's Billiam's video:

Labels: Billiam, charts, Nightingale Club

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Marcel Marceau has died. Here's Chig's fitting tribute:

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Labels: marcel marceau, obituary

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Psst! Don't tell anyone I told you, but if you can't wait for the charts to be revealed in the usual way on Radio1 this afternoon, no need to worry. For reasons I don't understand, Yahoo! Music has published them early! (It's 14:10 as I write this. These charts can't usually be published online until 19:00.) So, congrats to Sean Kingston (again), Plain White Ts (again) and James Blunt (new entry) on their number one singles, downloads and albums respectively.

Singles here, albums here and downloads here.

Labels: charts, leak

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So that was Summer. It ended at 09:51 this morning in the UK, with the vernal equinox; the start of Autumn. I still haven't had a proper holiday this year and the Summer never really started. How depressing...

Labels: season change

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Did you see the old couple on today's X Factor? I haven't seen her for over twenty years, but I'm 90% certain that Dorothy is the mother of my first ever boyfriend. Same surname, same area, she said she had sons (which fits) and she looks and sounds vaguely like I remember her.

I can't wait for boot camp now!

Labels: X Factor

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Music I've played this year on my PC
Originally uploaded by Chig66.

Here's an interesting graphic representation of all the tagged music I've played on my PC so far this year. It's best viewed by clicking on it to see it in flickr, as it's a huge file. (Go to 'All Sizes', then 'Original'.)

This was created on lastgraph, using the data from my profile (chig66) at last.fm. It's an interesting and colourful experiment, which shows that the music I've played on my PC this year peaked around Eurovision time in May. Funny that. As an overview of my musical tastes, it also shows the diversity quite nicely, but it's flawed because it doesn't show the music I play in other machines (CD players and the television - yes, really), which is more likely to be whole albums, rather than individual MP3s. It also doesn't show those albums, like Marc Almond's latest, Stardom Road, which aren't tagged properly and resolutely refuse to log their tracks when I play them on my PC.

Thanks to Signori Bitful for his assistance. His own graph is here.

Labels: bitful, last.fm, lastgraph, music

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Erasure - tomorrow night (Sunday) - Wolverhampton.

Want it? Please leave a comment.
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The thing about stereotypes is that they're usually based in truth, so was anyone surprised to hear that one of the Welsh rugby players, at the World Cup in France, has been found with a real live sheep in his hotel room? Dwayne Peel (left) is the player concerned. This has caused enormous shame and a great deal of embarrassment, but apparently the sheep has said she'll get over it.

(See also the last question here.)

World of Chig has secured an exclusive photo of guests arriving for the Welsh team's post-match party last Sunday:



Disclaimer: Chig is one quarter Welsh.

Labels: France, rugby world cup, sheep, Wales

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I stopped off in Oxford on Sunday, on the way back from Reading Pride. Sadly, I have to report that the standard of spelling in the heart of academia is in decline:

Labels: literacy, sign, spelling

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...because the inevitable has happened. Be very afraid. The Big Brother twins have recorded 'Barbie Girl' to unleash upon the world. (No mention of Samanda using Brian for the male vocals, as they performed it in the Big Brother garden.)

However, this is not our major concern. What bothers me is the utter tripe that comes in the press release for this today. Two quotes from Sony BMG. Both of them PR bollocks of the highest order:

"A spokesman for record company Sony BMG, which has signed up the twins, said: "It is a measure of how much viewers identified with the twins that they were the only Big Brother contestants never to have been nominated for a single eviction."

Excuse me? How much viewers identified with the twins? How did the viewers have any influence over who the housemates nominated? The person who wrote this must think that viewers choose who faces eviction in Big Brother. The fool. The lack of nominations just proved that they weren't unpopular amongst their fellow housemates, that's all. It had bugger all to do with how us viewers perceived them (and I would have voted to evict them at the first opportunity, had we been given the chance).

Second quote:

"They are also the only Big Brother contestants ever to have signed with a major record company. Superstardom beckons for them."

Only time will tell whether or not the twins manage to fulfil that final sentence and become the new Cheeky Girls, which we soooooo obviously need, but the first bit is rubbish. Obviously Sony BMG is massive, but WEA (Warners) isn't exactly small, and that's who released Craig's Top 14 Christmas smash, 'At This Time Of Year', after he won the first Big Brother in 2000.

But hold on, which label released his housemate Nichola Holt's 'The Game'; the very first single released by a Big Brother contestant? (It set the world on fire for one week at #72.) Well, well, well, it was only RCA/BMG (as it was then). Not only are Sony BMG telling porkies today, they're lying about themselves! It's a valuable warning, that we should never believe any PR guff from the music business any PR company whatsoever.

Footnote: Chig is unable to establish whether or not Deano & Bubble's football anthem 'Standing Tall' was on a major label, because:
(a) There's an inexplicable gap between the Deacon Blue and Death In Vegas singles, where this one should be.
(b) Incredible as it may seem, their England anthem didn't trouble the Top 75, despite my misguided purchase, so it's not listed in the Guinness book or on everyhit.com.

Let's watch the video instead:

Labels: Big Brother, Birmingham Pride, bollocks, Craig, Nichola Holt, Samanda, Sony BMG

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It's the final weekend of the UK's Mardi Gras & Pride season, so please say hello to Chig's friends Miss Brenda Bendover and Shandy Doris, who will be putting me up tonight as I venture deep into the Home Counties for my first ever Reading Pride this afternoon. It's Reading's third annual pride event, but the first time they haven't scheduled it against Cardiff Mardi Gras, so the first chance I've had to go. In fact, apart from visiting a former schoolfriend in 1985 at the university and occasionally changing trains at the station, I've never been to Reading, so I'm looking forward to it.

I have a feeling that, with these two as my hosts - a job that they also do at The Wynford Arms - it's going to be a hoot! The stripper they have there tonight is quite interesting as well. Sexecute, pictured here, has a website that actually makes interesting reading (or you can just look at the pictures).



Saturday trivia:

At some point this afternoon, the England cricket team, the England rugby team and the England football team will all be playing at the same time. (Not against each other - that would be foolish.) I wonder when that last happened?

Labels: Reading Pride, Sexecute

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Bienvenue en France pour la coupe du monde de rugby, qui commence aujourd'hui.

Actually, this Frenchman was in Cardiff last weekend for the Mardi Gras rugby tournament, not in Paris for today's Rugby World Cup opener. He wore that fluffy Tour Eiffel quite a lot.

Forty-eight international rugby matches between today and 20 October. (Yes, October!) Marvellous. Allez les rosbifs!


(L-R: Jonny Wilkinson, Olly Barkley, Jason Robinson.)

Labels: France, rugby world cup

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Rejoice, music lovers! Celebrate, chart fans! Radio 1 has finally sacked JK and Joel from the chart show. In fact, the morons are leaving the station completely, being replaced on their early morning show by an unknown 21 year-old student. I can't think of any other unprofessional pair of idiots who so richly deserve such an embarrassing slap in the face.

I hope Jerk and Jackoff will be very happy together at Magic FM, or wherever else it is they're going where you don't have to have any interest in music.

Well done Radio 1, for rescuing us from their inanity and ineptitude, but what took you so long, Andy Parfitt?

Labels: chart, JK and Joel, Radio 1

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Monday night. Just back from another brilliant Cardiff Mardi Gras weekend and absolutely cream crackered, but couldn't resist checking who won the Mr Gay UK final on Friday night. (Oddly, no one in Cardiff seemed to know. Or be bothered.) The regular reader (yes, that's you) may recall what I wrote (below) at lunchtime on Friday:

We're not overly impressed with this year's bunch, to be honest, but we'll go with Mr Blackpool to win it on home turf.

Guess what? He did. Congratulations to Dani Broughton (right), who has a webpage (of sorts) here and an official photo here.

The Guardian wrote an amusing preview of the Mr Gay UK final here.

I was, of course, thrilled with Brian's deserved win in Big Brother on Friday, and all six of my predictions from earlier in the week were within one place of the results, with third and fourth spot on. Thanks to Diamond Geezer for the washing machine update (see comments below) and thanks to Mark for supplying me with text messages at every stage of the Big Brother final, while as I was at a formal dinner for the Cardiff Lions rugby club. I intend to watch all of the weekend's Big Brother and BBLB on 4OD later this week.

Labels: Big Brother, Cardiff Mardi Gras, Mr Gay UK

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I've been off work for two days after a bizarre 'getting washing out of the washing machine' accident, in which I bent down awkwardly and felt a sharp pain in my back as I pulled a muscle. (One of my friends, who lives with his parents, said, "That's why I don't do my own washing." Wise words indeed.)

There are lots of things happening today and tomorrow:

The 10th anniversary of Diana's death and the memorial service in London.
- See my diary below.

The ending of the football transfer window at midnight.
- If Villa don't buy some decent players today, I will be very cross indeed, as we can't survive until January with the current, depleted squad.

My friend Eduardo's 32nd birthday.
- ¡Feliz cumpleaños Edu!

The Mr Gay UK final in Blackpool (and Doctor Who turning on the illuminations beforehand).
- The Birmingham twink seems to have disappeared from the list, so we won't be winning it for the fourth year (effectively) in a row. (We wouldn't if he were still in it anyway.)
- We're not overly impressed with this year's bunch, to be honest, but we'll go with Mr Blackpool to win it on home turf. Mr. Nottingham's not too bad, but it has to be said; where's the beef?

The Big Brother final.
- Bumbling Brian must win, not the dopey twins. And will Davina reveal the washing machine in the garden? How stupid are they all going to feel, after handwashing for 94 days?

However, I'll be missing all these, because I'm off to Cardiff for the Mardi Gras. A meal tonight with gay rugby players from various parts of Europe. I may get drunk and speak to the French ones. Oh, gay French rugby players. Be still my beating heart!

Tomorrow, an international gay rugby tournament on the castle fields, hosted by the Cardiff Lions, with me in attendance as official photographer. It's bigger than before, with 9 or ten teams, and includes women's teams for the first time.

Then the Mardi Gras event itself tomorrow afternoon and who knows what on Saturday night and Sunday? I probably won't even be watching the first ever Eurovision Dance Contest tomorrow night, hosted by the BBC (and Graham Norton) from London. With Brendan and Camilla as our imported entrants (from New Zealand and Denmark respectively), we might even have a chance of winning. Half of Austria's entry is British too, so vote for them. She's from Liverpool.

Must dash. Cardiff, here we come! Have a great weekend. Vote Brian!

Labels: Cardiff Mardi Gras, events, rugby, weekend

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After a fierce bidding war with the Daily Express, World of Chig has secured the exclusive rights to the first ever excerpts from Chig’s diaries to be published. No one has ever read these words before.

Before I reveal what I wrote in my diary, ten years ago today, when Diana died, some context is necessary. I was already having the worst time of my life, feeling anxious, depressed and helpless, because three days previously, at 8am on Thursday 28th August 1997, I had received a phone call from my sister, telling me that our Dad had suffered a heart attack. He was a on a bowls tour of Northern Ireland at the time, so we couldn’t just rush off to see him straight away and we were agonising over what to do. Unbelievably, Dad had actually had the heart attack a few days earlier, on the coach journey from the Midlands up to the ferry for Northern Ireland. I had no idea before then that anyone could have a heart attack without realising, but apparently it’s not uncommon. As early treatment is crucial after MIs (to give them their medical name), it was a miracle that Dad was still alive, but we weren’t sure at all what the prognosis was for the next few days, and if or when we would see him again.

On top of all that uncertainty, I was also being tormented by some kind of skin irritation or infestation, possibly scabies caused by mites or fleas from the carpet of my new house, the first I had owned, which I had moved into just a month before. (The previous owners had a cat and left a carpetful of fleas behind in the lounge.) It wasn’t a comfortable time, physically or emotionally.

On the Saturday night, I had gone to bed just after 1am and written my diary in bed, as usual. The car crash in Paris was just about to happen as I wrote this first entry. I then wrote another entry at lunchtime and a third one later that night. I think they give an interesting insight into what was going through my mind that day, even if some of it seems a bit daft now.

Sunday 31st August 1997 1.16am

It’s very hard not to think about Dad all the time that I’m not feeling mites (or whatever they are) on my face and ankles.

[…]

[My sister] spoke to Dad today. I didn’t. She said he was very solemn, and they’ve told him the heart attack was ‘bad’. Lucy [a friend of mine from Northern Ireland, living here in Birmingham] advised flying and hiring a car, when I went round to Deb’s this evening.


Sunday 31st August 1997 (again) 1.00pm

Princess Diana is dead. Along with Dodi Al-Fayed and a Ritz chauffeur, she was in a car crash in Paris and died at 3am British time (4am Paris time) from heart attacks in hospital, after two hours of medical attention.

I got up at 11.03 to come down and watch Hollyoaks. I noticed that the Archbishop of Canterbury was on BBC1 and BBC2, and though the Queen Mum had died. Then there was a shot of a wrecked car in Paris and the news that it was Diana.

As if to add to the misery, it’s raining heavily here, although not in London, where flowers are piling up at Buckingham and Kensington Palaces. Pleasingly, the BBC reporter there has said that lots of gay men are turning up because of her support for AIDS charities.

I rang [my sister] – she and [her partner] didn’t know, and we wondered if it was a bomb, but it was a pursuit with the paparazzi on motorbikes, crashing in the tunnel. Dodi was pronounced dead at the scene.

Poor Charles had to tell William and Harry. There’s uncertainty over whether she’ll have a state funeral. I don’t think the nation will forgive the Windsors if they don’t allow one.

Tony Blair’s comments moved me, and Earl Spencer, her brother, said he “always believed the press would kill her,” but didn’t expect that they would “take such a direct hand in her death”. Strong words indeed.

There’s solemn music in Radio 1, all BBC programmes suspended for continuous news. How considerate that they’ve just mentioned that Eastenders will be shown next Sunday. I was wondering.

In the midst of all this, I also rang Mum and left an answerphone message. [My sister] says she’s with [a friend] from Cambridge, out walking somewhere. I rang Dad at the hospital but they were busy and he had to ring me back. Our conversation ran out when his money did, but he didn’t complain that I told him [my sister] and I were going out there, with one of us accompanying him back. I wish it were easier to talk to him, but the payphone doesn’t have a number.

There’s a heavy atmosphere of gloom. It’s even dark now. I was going to go into work, or to Ikea, but I don’t think I’ll bother now. This is a uniquely depressing day.

I can’t help thinking that Diana lived her life like a film script, and it has ended in tragedy, and romance like a story by her step-grandmother, Barbara Cartland. No one would have been happy with an ending written like this.

Even Tom Cruise is on now, talking about the press harassment. She was the most photographed woman in the world. I would guess only Michael Jackson is more famous. No other person has so much attention paid to them. It’s an unnecessary tragedy.


Sunday 31st August 1997 (yet again) 11.56pm

Three diary entries in one day – and what a sombre, miserable, grey day it has been. All day I’ve been thinking we’ll wake up tomorrow and the Diana story won’t be true. At the same time, I’m worried about Dad. I only got to speak to him for about a minute, long enough to say we were going over, earlier today. I’m petrified of flying there, regardless of any other fears.

It has been a “horrible” day, as David Dimbleby said at the end of another tear-inducing tribute tonight. Radio 1 is still playing the same rotation of quite nice easy listening tunes. The only one I know is Sylvian & Sakamoto’s ‘Merry Christmas Mr. Lawrence’. It seems to crop up every hour. Oh, and Enigma too. People were saying on TV tonight that because the press (albeit the mercenary paparazzi) killed Diana, we shouldn’t buy tomorrow’s papers. It’ll be hard not to. Of course, no one knows if the chauffeur had a heart attack, skidded on oil, etc., but the photographers chasing them have been condemned already by the self-righteous TV journalists, as Bob Geldof pointed out.

Labels: Diana, diary

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It's what Diana would have wanted... 09011 21 22 16

Labels: Big Brother, Diana

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No wonder Ziggy was unhappy with the quiz on Sunday. The bits they showed in the highlights programme were bad enough. Here's a bit they didn't show:



While we're here, shall we declare the final order for Big Brother now? Why wait for Friday?

6th Carole
5th Jonty
4th Ziggy
3rd Liam
2nd Brian
1st Samanda (The twins)

I can live with any of the others winning, but not the twins. Why? Why? Why? What do people see in them? I can't even understand a word they say, most of the time.

Vote for Mr Entertainment! Vote for Mr Grateful! Vote Brian!

09011 21 22 16

Labels: Big Brother, YouTube

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09011 21 22 16

Don't let the useless twins snatch it away. Brian must win Big Brother!

09011 21 22 16

...and only seven days left for the housemates to find the washing machine.

Labels: Big Brother, Brian Belo, winner

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My Brum chums the Schlagerboys are touring Malta, funded by the Foreign & Commonwealth Office*, to thank the country for the UK's 12 points in Eurovision this year (which the boys themselves achieved). It was Russ Scooch's idea, the day after Eurovision, to reward Malta by UKers going there on holiday. The Schlagerboys have taken him at his word. They are doing this by investing heavily in the island's economy (vodka bars) and clearing dancefloors with their overly expressive fan-dance routines. (I heartily recommend reading about their week. It's hilarious.)

They've been stalking Chiara and Olivia Lewis, leaving gigs early for reasons best known to themselves and even been recognised, following their appearance on Maltese programme Xarabank, which was live from Helsinki in May. I just love this bit from their blog, about Chiara's hotel gig:

We finally got “Angel” at about 11:00. There was a fab bit when the Maltese family on the table next to us joined us in singing the chorus. The man said “Eurovision Chiara!” and we said something like “We love Chiara. We love Maltese Eurovision songs”, to which the woman replied “We know; we watched you on Xarabank!”

How utterly fabulous! Boys, you are national heroes! In both countries!

Tonight, they're live on Maltese TV show Pjazz! We can watch it here at 20:30 CET (or 20:40), just before watching annoying Tracey and dull Kara-Louise being evicted from Big Brother. Hurrah!

* The funding bit's not true, but it damn well should be.

Labels: Eurovision, Malta, Schlagerboys

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Occasionally in life, one has to make sacrifices in order to help a friend in need. So on Friday, when I received a call from my friend at The Nightingale Club, saying that they needed someone to come and photograph some real life firefighters who would be wrestling in oil on stage on Saturday night, I selflessly shelved my plans for the night, which involved a pizza and my television, and agreed to help them out. It was a tough job, but someone had to do it, and it was for charity. While I was there, we decided I might as well photograph their Wet'n'Wild competition afterwards, which is basically an amateur strip competition with the added gimmick of a shower on stage (with real, wet water). It's a cross I was prepared to bear.

So, last night, I forced myself to take 971 photos, of scenes like this:



And then this. He won the Wet'n'Wild competition (easily and deservedly):



Later on, some of the punters forced themselves in front of my camera lens, snatched a business card off me and made me put their number into my mobile. Like him:



More of the photos will be coming soon to a magazine near you (if you live in the Midlands) and The Nightingale's website. This photography thing is a tough gig, but I'm learning to cope with it.

Labels: firefighters, Nightingale, Wet'n'Wild

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