World of Chig   

10.9.09
Paris Is One Day Away

The title is true, so I can't resist posting this forgotten faux New Romantic classic from The Mood. I have this on a picture disc 7" single!



And here's the reason for our road trip to Paris. Mylène Farmer at the Stade de France, tomorrow night. Formidable!

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15.7.09
Who does Davina McCall think she is?

Chig is excited by the return tonight of his favourite factual programme on TV; Who Do You Think You Are? The new series starts with the fabulous Davina McCall examining the French side of her family. I've read about it in the current edition of the magazine that accompanies the series (I've subscribed since the magazine started) and it sounds merveilleux! Chig is also slightly amused that the BBC has scheduled this programme at 21:00, directly against Big Brother on 4. I know she's only involved in Big Brother on Fridays, but it's still Davina's programme. I wonder which one she'll be watching live tonight?

While we're on the subject of Big Brother, what is this nonsense they keep propagating about this being their TENTH anniversary week? Yesterday was the ninth anniversary of the UK's Big Brother starting, on 14 July 2000. The tenth anniversary will obviously be on 14 July next year. Is there no one in Channel 4 or Endemol with the intelligence to distinguish between a tenth series and a tenth anniversary? The idiots really are taking over...

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7.7.09
Bye bye Kris!

Big Brother should be worth watching on Friday. I can't wait to see smug Kris's face when Davina announces he's been evicted. Ha ha.

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Last request

Watching Michael Jackson's memorial service has reminded me to add a line to my will. Just in case I don't make it, let it be known now that, when you organise my celebrity-filled, non-religious memorial service, on no account must Mariah 'insincere' Carey be allowed anywhere near it. Thank you.

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5.7.09
Cascada, Jacko & Federer make history

Milestone UK number one singles

100th Do You Mind? - Anthony Newley (April 1960)
200th Help! - The Beatles (April 1965)
300th Knock Three Times - Dawn (May 1971)
400th Don't Cry For Me, Argentina (February 1977)
500th A Little Peace - Nicole (May 1982)
600th China In Your Hand - T'Pau (November 1987)
700th Twist And Shout - Chaka Demus & Pliers featuring Jack Radics and Taxi Gang (January 1994)
800th Bootie Call - All Saints (September 1998)
900th Lady Marmalade - Christina Aguilera / Lil' Kim / Mya / P!nk (June 2001)
1,000th One Night / I Got Stung - Elvis Presley (January 2005)
1,100th Evacuate The Dancefloor - Cascada (July 2009) TODAY!



Michael Jackson's 'Man In The Mirror' was leading the midweek charts every day this week, but Cascada's new single was closing in on it every day, at a rate which made it look as if they would claim today's number one spot and the 1,100th UK number one, and indeed they have. At least they're alive and available for any PR that the Official Charts Company may want to do with them. The OCC had to put up with Elvis Presley posthumously claiming the 1,000th number one in 2005, so they may have been dreading another dead artist claiming the 1,100th today. (And it's not as if Michael Jackson needs any more publicity at the moment.) The OCC could start by mentioning this milestone to Radio 1. Reggie Yates has presented the Top 40 for three hours this afternoon without mentioning this chart milestone at all, even when he announced Cascada as the number one at the end. The team behind the Radio 1 chart show really is useless.

Cascada are German and Elvis Presley was American, as were the four acts on 'Lady Marmalade', the 900th number one, so the last UK act to claim a 'century number one' remains All Saints, who secured the 800th with Bootie Call in 1998.

'Man In The Mirror' therefore fails to make number one (although there's always next week, with the continued Jacko publicity that his memorial service and funeral will bring in the coming days). This will no doubt surprise the many people who are convinced that it's number one already. Two of my colleagues last Monday informed me that Michael Jackson was number one. I pointed out that Man In The Mirror was number 11, the highest of his six tracks in the top 40, but "it was on Sky News" that Jacko had topped the chart, therefore it must be true, in their eyes. Sky News (and also independent radio) was quoting the 'Big Top 40', which was solely based on iTunes last week. It was not the official chart, which included the (admittedly minimal) physical sales and a much wider range of download outlets. Some people seem to think iTunes IS the UK's music retail industry, but it's not there yet, and history so far will not record a posthumous Michael Jackson number one.

Jackson has however, shattered Presley's record of seven concurrent top 40 hits, with an incredible thirteen of today's Top 40 being by him, up from last week's six entries. All of them climb today and four of them are in consecutive positions #32 to #35. 'Thriller' almost outpeaked its original 1983 peak of #10, but fell away towards the end of the week to land at #12 today. 'Man In The Mirror' at #2 has easily surpassed its original peak of #21.

Michael Jackson hits in today's Top 40:

02 (11) Man In The Mirror

10 (25) Billie Jean

12 (23) Thriller
13 (28) Smooth Criminal

19 (30) Beat It

25 (45) Black Or White
26 (50) Dirty Diana

32 (67) They Don't Care About Us
33 (38) Earth Song
34 (47) The Way You Make Me Feel
35 (44) You Are Not Alone

38 (48) Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough

40 (57) Bad

Michael Jackson has also replaced himself at the top of today's album chart, as 'The Essential' pushes 'Number Ones' down to #3, with La Roux's eponymous début album entering at #2. 'King Of Pop' at #5 completes three top five albums for Jacko.

While I was listening to the Top 40 via the earpiece on my mobile, I was multi-tasking, watching the amazingly long Wimbledon final between Federer and Roddick. Pete Sampras was there to see Federer rub Sampras's name from the record books as he moved up to fifteen Grand Slam titles, beating the record of fourteen titles which they held jointly since last month, when Federer won the French Open for the first time. Federer has now won six of the last seven Wimbledon titles, only one behind Sampras himself, while Andy Roddick has lost three Wimbledon finals, all to Federer. I felt so sorry for him. He's never won it, and this looked like it may have been his best chance ever. Federer didn't break Roddick's service at all until right at the end, as he only won two earlier sets on tie breaks, whereas Roddick had won his two sets by breaking Federer's serve twice. It's all part of the glorious unfairness of tennis, where you can win a match by wining fewer games overall, or by breaking your opponent fewer times. Roddick was in tears after losing the final set 16-14. It's not surprising, the poor thing. This picture says it all.

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28.6.09
Michael Jackson dominates today's UK charts

The top eight albums on the UK's iTunes yesterday were all Michael Jackson or The Jacksons, with a similar situation in most countries that have iTunes, so it's no surprise that his 'Number Ones' album has rocketed from #121 to #1 in the official UK chart today. The compilation originally topped the chart on release in November 2003, so this makes it the third biggest gap for the same album topping the UK chart, behind two longer gaps for ABBA's Gold album.

In the singles chart, Michael Jackson has smashed The Jam's record of having thirteen singles in the top 75. He has twenty in total; 16 solo, 3 by The Jackson 5 and one more by their later incarnation, The Jacksons. Six of them have made the top 40, leaving him just short of the record of seven consecutive top 40 hits, held by Elvis Presley. It was close though, and who's to say it won't change next week? Today's chart covers seven days of sales, with only the last 48 hours being post-Jackson's death, so the impact could continue next week.

La Roux claim the UK's 1,099th number one today, with Bulletproof. The 1,000th number one was an Elvis Presley re-release. Could it be that Michael Jackson will continue the posthumous trend and get the 1,100 milestone next week?

These are the six Michael Jackson tracks in today's top 40:

11 (RE) Man In The Mirror - Michael Jackson. (The only Jacko track to reach a new peak in the Top 40 today, surpassing its #21 peak from Feb 1988. Also made #55 in Nov 2008, after Diana Vickers performed it on The X Factor.)

23 (193) Thriller – Michael Jackson (#10 in Nov 1983. #35 in Nov 2008. Always lurking around the bottom of the top 200 anyway, this now becomes the biggest ever climber to #23.)

25 (RE) Billie Jean – Michael Jackson (#1 in Feb 1983 for 1 week. #11 in Mar 2006.)

28 (RE) Smooth Criminal – Michael Jackson (#8 in Nov 1988. #19 in Apr 2006.)

30 (RE) Beat It – Michael Jackson (#3 in Apr 1983. #15 in Mar 2006)

38 (RE) Earth Song – Michael Jackson (Jacko's biggest-selling UK single. His only million seller. Entered at #1 in Dec 1995. #1 for 6 weeks. Also #34 in Jun 2006.)

Here are his other tracks in the top 75:

44 You Are Not Alone
45 Black Or White
47 The Way You Make Me Feel
48 Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough
50 Dirty Diana
55 I Want You Back - The Jackson 5
57 Bad
58 Ben
65 ABC - The Jackson 5
67 They Don't Care About Us
71 I'll Be There - The Jackson 5
72 Wanna Be Startin' Somethin'
73 Rock With You
75 Blame It On The Boogie - The Jacksons

And the rest of the top 200:

78 Heal The World
85 Off The Wall
86 Can You Feel It? - The Jacksons
92 I Just Can't Stop Loving You
95 She's Out Of My Life
96 Ain't No Sunshine
97 You Rock My World
99 One Day In Your Life

106 Scream - Michael Jackson & Janet Jackson
109 Human Nature
111 Rockin' Robin
112 Who's Lovin' You? - The Jackson 5(?)
115 Remember The Time
117 Give In To Me
118 Liberian Girl
119 Leave Me Alone
120 Will You Be There?
125 P.Y.T. (Pretty Young Thing)
135 Stranger In Moscow
149 ???
172 The Girl Is Mine (Not sure if this is the 1982 version with Paul McCartney or the one with Will.I.Am from last year.)
177 Shake Your Body (Down To The Ground) - The Jacksons
190 Blood On The Dancefloor

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26.6.09
The UK's gone Jacko mad

Selections from the UK's iTunes top 100, as of around 13:00 today.

13 Man In the Mirror - Michael Jackson
30 Thriller (Single Version) - Michael Jackson
32 Billie Jean (Single Version) - Michael Jackson
40 Beat It (Single Version) - Michael Jackson
48 I Want You Back - The Jackson 5
49 Ben - Michael Jackson
51 Earth Song (Radio Edit) - Michael Jackson
53 You Are Not Alone (Single Version) - Michael Jackson
56 Black or White - Michael Jackson
57 Smooth Criminal - Michael Jackson
59 The Way You Make Me Feel - Michael Jackson
62 Smooth Criminal (Radio Edit) - Michael Jackson
64 Dirty Diana - Michael Jackson
65 Billie Jean - Michael Jackson
69 Off the Wall (Single Version) - Michael Jackson
75 Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough (Edited Single) - Michael Jackson
76 Man In the Mirror - Michael Jackson
78 Bad - Michael Jackson
88 Liberian Girl - Michael Jackson
89 Ain't No Sunshine - Michael Jackson
91 They Don't Care About Us (Edit) - Michael Jackson
92 Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough (Single Version) - Michael Jackson
96 I'll Be There - The Jackson 5

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This Is It

Jacko's tour title turns out to be prophetic, a bit sooner than intended. Gone at 50.

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I feel sorry for La Roux. 'Bulletproof' was heading for number one this Sunday, but will Jacko now do a Lennon/Presley?

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5.6.09
Reasons for watching BB10 all Summer

4.6.09
BB10 - cast list

Quote of the night on election day and the Big Brother launch, from Davina:

"And remember, people died for your right to chat shit about Big Brother."

And with that, on with the show.

1. Freddie, 23
Privileged, Tory voter and anarchist. Family employs two gardeners.
“It’s time to be a young playboy.”
Wearing mad fur hat.
Talking out loud when in house alone, showing off.
From “Staffordshire and Shropshire, like,” he tells Cairon later.
Bisexual, with a preference for women but, "after a few tequilas, all bets are off".
Gemini.

2. Lisa, 41, unemployed. The third legitimate housemate, simply because she answered the phone.
Lesbian converter of straight women, she says.
Red mohican.
Sounds Brummy. I must know people who know her.

3. Sophie, 20, model.
Did nude stuff for Playboy.
“I’m clever.”
Had implants six weeks ago. Wobbly when climbing steps!
Single. Has two chihuahuas.

4. Kris, 24, Visual merchandiser. The fourth legitimate housemate, chosen by Lisa.
For All Saints in Manchester.
Originally from Shrewsbury. Went to Manchester, fashion studies, dropped out, modelled in New Zealand. Went to Ibiza and got the All Saints job.
Big hair.

5. Noirin, 25. The second legitimate housemate, chosen by Rodrigo to have her eyebrows shaved off.
Irish, from Dublin. Religious, tries to follow the ten commandments.
Exhibitionist. Displayed her fangita in a club.
Former athlete; sprinter. Has done a reality TV show before.
Straight and "really unlucky with boys".

6. Cairon, 18, student.
Born in UK, moved to America when aged one.
“I feel weird just wiping my own ass, you know what I’m sayin’?” (When asked if he is gay.)
Attracted to big women.
Fave word = shorty.
Studying music at college. Youngest in house - birthday 5 July.

7. Angel, 35, professional boxer and artist
Russian.
Tough and fit. Was a 'rockstar' - in1992 won award for most promising artist.
Dressed with top hat, skirt suit and cane.
LATER: Boy oh boy, is she bossy! She's leading them in a military-style exercise session in the garden and they're all scared stiff of her!

8. Carly
Another blonde. Scottish. Dated a Scottish 3rd division footballer.
Dropped out of uni after 3 weeks.
Taking two breast fillers into the house.

9. Marcus, 35, window fitter
Wolverine. Nutter.
Arse and soles of feet are “out of bounds”
“I think I’m cool as fuck.”
Fave word = quagmire

10. Beinazir, 28, receptionist
Muslim. Hasn’t been to mosque for years.
Named after Benazir Bhuto.
Taking 149 pieces of jewellery into the house.
"Dippy" and "clumsy".

11. Sophia
“Portable pleasure” at 4’11”.
In banking. Has lupus.
“Fun-loving, fierce, feisty…”
Screamer.
Passionate Eurosceptic.

12. Rodrigo, 23, Brazilian. Became the first legitimate housemate, by answering a call to the diary room.
From Sao Paolo.
Omnisexual. “Britain is turning me gay.”
More BelAmi than euroboy.

13. Charlie Drummond, 22, customer services adviser.
Mr Gay Newcastle 2007.
Two of my friends have apparently slept with him.
Geordie chav.
Looks buff, but intro VT implied he may be a bit of a twat.
More euroboy than BelAmi.
"I'm Charlie, like the drug", he tells Angel.

14. Saffia, dental nurse
Baby of 7 months, child of 6.
Would consider lesbianism.

15. Sree, 25, SU president (Hertfordshire Uni)
Hindu from India
Cute. Loving his accent.
Wearing Union flag shirt, waving Indian flag.
My favourite.

16. Siavash, 23, events organiser
Eccentric. Hairy. Born in Iran. Father was politician, so family had to leave. Moved to Sweden, then UK.
“Uniquely good-looking. Everybody fancies me.”
Full of himself.
Lots of booing.

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That's the serious business of the day over with...



Chig has now voted in the Euro election, despite not having bothered to check his poll card first, which would have saved visiting the two usual polling stations and having to come back home to see that it's in a completely different school today. Doh! Turnout extremely low in Balsall Heath, apparently. The nice man said it's normally 43-44% in our ward. It looked more like 10% today, on the pages I saw his colleague flick through. On some pages there were just a handful of names crossed out (as having voted), with three columns per page of voters.

Now bring on Big Brother!

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BB10?

Will we be seeing this proper Charlie later with Davina?

LATER: Yes, we are!

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Vote, vote, vote!

If you're not sure which party best represents your views in the European elections today, why not go to VoteMatch and answer thirty quick questions? It will then give you your score for all the main candidates in your Euro constituency. (Top Tip: I recommend you leave all parties highlighted at the end, rather than choosing who you might vote for, as it then gives you a whole set of results.)

My results contained some shocks. No surprise that the Greens come out on top, given that I'll be voting Green, as I always have done in Euro elections, and I've voted for them since they were the Ecology Party. But the Lib Dems would be my only second choice, but they're fifth here, reflecting the fact that they're just a bit too Euro-enthusiastic in some aspects for my liking. I would never vote for any of the others, so seeing Libertas(!) in joint second with the new Jury Team and the Tories in fourth is a bit of a shock. Still, it's not domestic policies, but my score for Labour just sums up how detached I am from them these days.

Green Party 51/62

Geoffrey Coady (Jury Team) 39/62
Libertas 39/62

Conservative Party 34/62

Liberal Democrats 33/62

UK Independence Party 31/62

Labour Party 21/62

I just hope people don't vote for the three homophobic parties; the English Democrats, the BNP and the Christian coalition. Nasty, nasty parties, all three of them, for a variety of reasons. But I fear Sunday night is going to contain some hard-to-swallow results for the country, not just for Gordon Brown before he resigns on Monday.

But first, we probably have to watch the Tories take control of all four of Labour's county councils tonight. For once, I won't be staying up for it. It's too depressing. (And I'm on early shift at work on Friday.)

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31.5.09
Titanic

Chig is saddened to hear that a link with the past has finally been broken today with the sad death of Millvina Dean, the last survivor of the Titanic. She was rescued from the sinking ship as a baby, and reached the grand old age of 97. I feel an appropriately sombre tribute is due.

But no, there's always a Eurovision connection. Let's have this instead.

'Titanic' by Frederik



You might think that a jolly pop song about 1,517 people dying when a boat sank, by Finland's answer to Engelbert Humperdinck (meets David Hasselhoff) could be inappropriate. But no, for Frederik, songs about sinking boats are his speciality. Here's another one he made, about the tragic sinking of the MS Estonia ferry in 1994, which killed 852 people. Frederik's capacity for songs about seafaring disasters is truly astonishing. How was he overlooked when Ferry Aid was put together?

'Estonia' by Frederik

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17.5.09
Norway wins, Chig defeated.


Today, 17th May, is Norway's National Day. Could it possibly have started any better for Norway? It was about fifteen minutes into the National Day, Norwegian time, when they won Eurovision for the third time last night/this morning. Congratulations to Norway and congratulations to Alexander Rybak who celebrated his 23rd birthday this week. Not only did he perform 'Fairytale', but he wrote it too. With his record score and record winning margin, with points from every single one of the other 41 countries, it was a phenomenal victory, although he didn't quite beat the 'percentage of available points' record which the UK still holds through Brotherhood Of Man in 1976, so he's not quite the biggest winner ever.

Congratulations too to Jade Ewen and the BBC team. Achieving the UK's first ever fifth place was just fantastic (and I don't just mean because it filled in a gap in our record of the last 52 years!) It made for such an enjoyable evening for us, as points rolled in for the UK from a fantastic 31 of the 41 countries. All that touring by Jade paid off, as did her flawless performance. (Although someone told me that Jade was hit in the face by one of her violinists during the song. Did you see that?)

Jade has entered the official singles chart at #50 (up from #103 last week, which must have been cherry-picking from the Eurovision album, as Jade's single package wasn't released until this week). The CD is out tomorrow, but #50 is already nearly twenty places higher than Andy Abraham managed last year with his Eurovision single. Jade is now also in the iTunes top twenty at last, after a steady climb all week.

I had a fantastic Eurovision night, with the party at the Wellington, then seeing Jessica Garlick and Scooch perform at the Nightingale and chatting with all of them, before I made it home for 5:30am, but the late night and the alcohol have enabled the cold which had been stalking me for the last few days to well and truly take hold today. It has bunged up my nose and ears and nearly knocked me out, so I'm having an early night as I can hardly breathe.

More facts, figures, observations and photos later this week.

In the meantime, Alexander Rybak has jumped from #204 on the UK iTunes chart yesterday to #4 today. Sixteen of the 25 Eurovision finalists figure in the UK iTunes chart today, as listed below. Funny how we gave Turkey our 12 points and yet they're so low down the iTunes chart, isn't it?

Norway #4
UK #15 and #254
Iceland #33
Germany #75
Estonia #86
Sweden #88
Azerbaijan #91
Turkey #94
Finland #107
Portugal #121
Ukraine #124
Armenia #125
Denmark #147
Greece #168
Moldova #207
Russia #216

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16.5.09
Eurovision - Tonight's Final

You have to feel for those who are attending the Eurovision final in Moscow tonight, especially the performers, as the show starts at 23:00 local time, scheduled to finish at 02:15. That means the winner's media conference will probably start at around 03:00 and finish about 04:00. Then there's a party... Good luck, all of you!

My each way bets for tonight, placed before the semi-finals, are on these five countries to finish in the top four. Obviously at least one of them will fail, but it won't matter, especially if Armenia make it again. (They were fourth last year.)

Song 08 Greece
Song 09 Armenia

Song 11 Azerbaijan
Song 12 Bosnia-Herzegovina

Song 20 Norway


If Bosnia don't make the top 4, I will be surprised and a lot poorer. My ten bets for Thursday's semi-final produced a return of £37.04, after betting £38, so despite getting eighto ut of ten right, Ilost 96p overall. I did better on Tuesday, withonly seven right but a profit of nearly £16. At least I'm in profit overall, so far.

I'm worried that there are now nine countries which I think could win and the more I think about France, the more I think it could be them. I hadn't realised until this week that Patricia Kaas is famous in the East as well as Western Europe. She received a gold disc for album sales in Russia in her Eurovision media conference this week. Her performance seems to stop everyone in their tracks, being described as "stunning" and "mesmeric". A second win for France, with Paris next year, would be wonderful. It just won't win me any money.

But I've only narrowed down the potential winners to eleven countries. Ha, ha. I don't think the fourteen not listed here have a chance, but won't it be funny if I'm wrong?

The potential winners are, I believe:

03 France
08 Greece
09 Armenia
11 Azerbaijan
12 Bosnia-Herzegovina
15 Estonia
18 Turkey
19 Albania
20 Norway
21 Ukraine
23 United Kingdom

The UK votes 20th tonight, out of the 42. We're after Lithuania. Will we reduce our usual recent points for Greece and Turkey in favour of Alexander Rybak for Norway? Will we also give middle points to the Swedish popera? Possibly yes in both cases.

The last five countries to vote are all from Eastern Europe, so if it's neck and neck between, say Norway and Bosnia, the Eastern country will win. A Western country will need to have a commanding lead after Denmark votes 37th in order to win.

Something you should know about Jade Ewen. The UK entry was given away last week as a free CD with Russian OK magazine, so lots of Russians have it. This was arranged by Universal, her record company. I've also read that it has SOLD another 100,000 copies in Russia. I'm expecting big points from Russia later, if not some of her former satellite countries too. Putin promised it to Andrew Lloyd Webber, after all.

Another thing you should know is that MTV Russia had a poll three or four weeks ago and viewers voted the UK winner of all the 42 songs. The winner! Is it any wonder we're slightly excited?

Here in the UK, Jade has at last sneeked into the midweeks at #69 in the official UK chart, taking sales up to Thursday night into account. She's up to #43 on iTunes, where Alexander Rybak's 'Fairytale' has also sneeked in at #204, being cherry-picked from the Eurovision compilation album.

Whatever you're doing tonight, have fun and enjoy what promises to be a spectacular show, with better presenters, Cirque du Soleil and a flying Dima Bilan, plus some close voting, I hope, made more unpredictable with the input of music business juries deciding 50% of the vote from each country, with televoting accounting for the other half.

If you want a pointless prediction, I'll go with this:

1st Bosnia-Herzegovina
2nd Norway
3rd Greece
4th France
5th Azerbaijan
6th United Kingdom

23rd Spain
24th Romania
25th Germany

I'll be watching at the Wellington in Brum with about 20-30 people crammed into the pub's small back room, before popping out later to see Jessica Garlick and Scooch at the Nightingale. It should be quite a night!

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Moscow's main event



The banned Slavic Pride parade (as it had been renamed) in Moscow 'sort of' took place earlier today. I awoke to the news (on Five Live) that Peter Tatchell had been arrested there. It's nothing less than I expected, but given that the mayor of Moscow had banned the Pride parade but approved counter-demonstrations by right wing groups with a history of attacking these gay events, I salute the bravery of Tatchell and the Russian people who took part. Around 20 of them have been arrested.

The Toppers, from the Netherlands, had vowed to boycott tonight's Eurovision final if the Pride parade was attacked today, but they didn't make the final anyway. Kudos to Malena Ernman though, representing Sweden tonight, who has spoken out in favour of the parade and said she would be proud to call herself gay for the day. We love Sweden.

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It's our time, it 's our time, our moment...



Jade Ewen at last night's second dress rehearsal for the Eurovision final tonight. Big in the hall, apparently, although the stage crew is having difficulty bringing her staircase on stage in time, so they had to cut to the green room in the rehearsal. Barring a croaky voice or Jade falling over in her high heels, I really think we're heading for the UK's best result since 2002, when Jessica Garlick came third. Anything worse than top ten will now be seen as a failure, but I think we could really be top six and, with the wind in the right direction, yes, I think there's a possibility of winning. Brace yourselves, Cardiff! Fingers are very firmly crossed.

Photo (c) All Kinds Of Everything 2009.

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15.5.09
Today's Eurovision reading

...is Mike's article in today's Guardian. The online version is here. Very good it is too, as he previews ten of the songs in tomorrow's final.

It's perfect reading while we sit and wait for streaming (or YouTube) of the UK's media conference in Moscow today (13:30 BST, 16:30 Moscow time). Jade Ewen, Graham Norton, Diane Warren and Sir Andrew Lloyd Webber all at once! It should be good.

UPDATE: ESC Today's report on the UK conference is here.

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¿Eurovision? ....... Mañana

Scandal in Spain.

Spanish TV (TVE) has broken the Eurovision rules. They showed last night's semi-final, in which the Spanish public was due to vote, with an hour's delay, preferring to continue with a tennis match from the Madrid Masters instead. Consequently, it was impossible to have a televote, so Spain's points (still a secret until early Sunday morning) were determined by the five music biz people who made up the Spanish jury.

No one bats an eyelid when a country like Andorra has a televote that's too small and the back-up jury vote is used instead, but for one of Eurovision's Big 4 to do this intentionally, with a population of forty million people represented by five, because of a tennis match, this is scandalous. Spanish Eurovision fans are furious!

It's even worse than it sounds, because Spain had originally been due to vote in Tuesday's semi-final, with Germany and the UK. Only two weeks ago, they asked for permission to vote in the second semi-final instead, so that Spanish TV could show a political debate. This raised a few eyebrows, as it was the first case of a country choosing which show to vote on when the competing songs were already known. It also left Portugal and Andorra in despair, stranded without their usual points from Spain. (Portugal survived and made the final. Andorra didn't.) Nevertheless, the EBU consented to TVE's request but now it has been a complete waste of time as they didn't bother to show last night's semi-final in real time.

Spain has broken the rules, which oblige any voting country to show the programme live, but will anything happen? Will the EBU dare to punish one of the Big 4? It would be unfair to punish Soraya, who closes the Eurovision final on Saturday, with one of Spain's best songs for years. Maybe they should be forced into the semi-finals next year? Or maybe Spain should be replaced in the Big 4 by Russia (or Sweden!) Maybe that's what Spanish TV is trying to achieve anyway?

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14.5.09
Eurovision - The Final Running Order

(Blogged live, while watching the draw on eurovision.tv)

The countries in bold are tonight's qualifiers, in the slots they've just drawn in the conference hall in Moscow. Rather charmingly, the numbers are on bits of paper inside Matrushka dolls. Thankfully only one doll.

Alexander Rybak from Norway pulled out the draw he needed - 20th slot. Of the slots still available tonight, only 21st could have been better.

It's now a very slow start to the final. For those who think the French song is also dreary, they'll have nodded off until Sweden wakes them up at song four.

Ukraine drew the prime slot that was left, at 21. Saturday's final certainly builds up to towards the end now!

01 Lithuania
02 Israel
03 France
04 Sweden
05 Croatia
06 Portugal
07 Iceland
08 Greece
09 Armenia
10 Russia
11 Azerbaijan
12 Bosnia-Herzegovina
13 Moldova
14 Malta
15 Estonia
16 Denmark
17 Germany
18 Turkey
19 Albania
20 Norway
21 Ukraine
22 Romania
23 United Kingdom
24 Finland
25 Spain

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Eurovision - Semi 2 - Predictions



But first, as I fear he won't get through tonight, here's my Sexiest Man of Eurovision 2009 award. It goes to Zoli Ádok, who will look very good singing and dancing with a vest on tonight for Hungary. Sadly, his song's a bit mediocre, but if people vote for the best hunk in a vest, he could be in luck. Zoli's the one on the left by the way. The one on the right is the lovely Franko from the OnEurope blog team. Franko has been having his picture taken with almost all of this year's contestants (32 out of 42 when I last asked) and the results are all here on his Flickr photostream.

Predictions then.

Qualifying for the final from tonight's second Eurovision semi-final in Moscow.

Dead certs:

Norway - CORRECT
Azerbaijan - CORRECT
Greece - CORRECT

Quite likely:

Moldova - CORRECT
Albania - CORRECT
Netherlands - WRONG
Denmark - CORRECT

Next most likely:
Ukraine - CORRECT
Estonia - CORRECT
Latvia - WRONG

So that's my ten. In Tuesday's semi-final, I struggled to find seven songs, after seeing the performances, that I wanted to progress to the final. In tonight's semi-final, there are fourteen I'd like to see go through, so there is bound to be some disappointment.

I haven't done any big bets tonight, but I've put between one and ten pounds on each of the ten above, just for the sake of it.

Sadly, tonight's hosts in Moscow will be the same as Tuesday's. Reports from Moscow say they're even worse in rehearsals, and the performers are having more trouble singing in tune too.

If the BBC doesn't show the interval act tonight, I'll probably withhold my licence fee, after they deprived us of t.A.T.u. with the Red Army Choir on Tuesday, doing my favourite t.A.T.u. song, Not Gonna Get Us. I'd been looking forward to it, but we got a pointless interview instead.

BBC Three, 20:00 BST.

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13.5.09
If it really is her time, someone had better tell UK music buyers

The physical release of Jade Ewen's 'It's My Time' was supposed to have been this week, but it's been postponed to next Monday instead, obviously so they can put 'Eurovision 2009 winner' stickers on the CDs. The download was released on iTunes though. As physical sales only account for around 2% of singles sales nowadays, the delayed CD release shouldn't be preventing Jade from storming the charts on Sunday then, should it?

Let's see how the Radio Edit has been doing in the iTunes chart so far this week.

By Sunday night: made #93
By Monday night: fallen to #110
By last night: up to #68

UPDATES
Wednesday night: up to #62
Thursday night: up to #59
10:00 Friday morning: up to #52
Friday night: up to #43 on iTunes, but now appearing in the official chart's midweeks (up to Thursday night) at #69.

Not exactly setting the world on fire, is it? If Polydor/Universal had released the song as a download in March, when Jade won Eurovision: Your Country Needs You, it would easily have gone top 5 on the back of the TV exposure and, with the way singles sales work these days, it would still be hanging around and having a resurgence now. I expect it will go much higher than #68 eventually but still, an opportunity wasted. So far.

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Дмитрий Шепелев

Дмитрий Шепелев (Dmitriy Shepelev) was easily the best thing about the hosts of last night's Eurovision semi-final. He looked even hunkier than this picture and his silliness in the Green Room was easily forgiven, compared with the two main hosts, Andrey Malakhov and Natalia Vodianova, who were atrocious, as per usual for Eurovision. He has spent the last ten days hosting nearly a hundred media conferences for the assembled hacks, so he deserves a pat on the back. I would be happy to give him one.

Russia had a year to prepare for this, but only announced the hosts last week. Did no one want the job? The lack of preparation showed through as clearly as the lack of a scriptwriter. If they had one, they must have wasted all their time writing that twaddle for the opening sequence, which wasted five minutes of my life. We have to put up with the terrible twosome again on Thursday. They should promote Dmitriy to the main stage and get rid of the bouffant man. Luckily, we have completely different hosts for Saturday's final, in the sexy shape of Alsou, who represented the motherland in 2000, famously accompanied by equally sexy British dancers David and Will, who Wogan memorably described, with a talent for accuracy which sometimes deserted him, as "big girls' blouses". Alsou will be accompanied by the splendidly named Ivan Urgant. Perhaps he will live up to his (almost) surname and just get on with the bloody thing.

Here's another picture of Dmitriy Shepelev, this one in the Eurovision media centre, courtesy of eurovision.tv. Every day that goes by makes me wish a little more that I'd gone to Moscow. Sigh.

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Cardiff International Arena



Ideal size for hosting Eurovision 2010.
Ideally located to suit BBC regionalisation policy.

Hosts: Jessica Garlick & James Fox.

Sorted.

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12.5.09
Eurovision - Semi 1 qualifiers - positions in the final

Excellent news for Jade Ewen and the UK, as two dancey numbers which haven't a hope of winning have just been drawn before her and after her in Saturday's final. This is the best we could have hoped for. There's now no likely winner near the UK at the end of the show. Dare we hope? Dare we?

The media masses in Moscow have apparently gone into a UK-based frenzy following this draw. Andrew Lloyd Webber clearly convinced Mr Putin to allow weak songs to be drawn around us to make us look even better. Spasiba!

The line-up for Saturday's Eurovision final now looks like this. Tonight's ten qualifiers are in bold. The Big 4 and hosts Russia were already drawn into place. The other ten places will be taken by Thursday's qualifiers.

01
02 Israel
03 France
04 Sweden
05
06 Portugal
07 Iceland
08
09 Armenia
10 Russia
11
12 Bosnia-Herzegovina
13
14 Malta
15
16
17 Germany
18 Turkey
19
20
21
22 Romania
23 United Kingdom
24 Finland
25 Spain

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Eurovision - Semi 1 - Predictions

Qualifying for the final from tonight's first Eurovision semi-final in Moscow.

Dead certs:

Armenia - CORRECT
Turkey - CORRECT
Bosnia-Herzegovina - CORRECT

Quite likely:


Malta - CORRECT
Portugal - CORRECT

Next most likely:

Belarus - WRONG
Switzerland - WRONG
Romania - CORRECT
Sweden - CORRECT
Bulgaria - WRONG

So that's my ten, in a very unpredictable semi-final tonight. This semi-final is far, far worse than Thursday's. I struggle to find ten songs I want to put through to the final from tonight's eighteen. On Thursday, there are far more deserving songs.

I have serious bets on Armenia, Turkey and Bosnia-Herzegovina qualifying tonight. If they do, I'm laughing. I also have smaller bets on Portugal and Malta, plus a wildcard bet on Belgium, despite reports of bad rehearsals (see also Sweden), on the basis that the whole of Europe loves Elvis.

Have fun tonight if you're watching with the lovely Paddy O'Connell on BBC Three, 20:00 BST.

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11.5.09
Eurovision: We Vote Tomorrow!

When the draw was made on 30 January this year, which determined that the UK would be voting in the first Eurovision semi-final, on the Tuesday, I said to friends that the BBC had another major challenge this year. They needed to make people aware that the Tuesday semi-final exists. It looks to me as if they just haven't even bothered to try. The trailers have started for Saturday's final, featuring Jade, Jade and more Jade, but the existence of any semi-finals, let alone the one we're voting in tomorrow, isn't mentioned.

Have the semi-finals been advertised at all? Please let us all know in the comments if you've seen or heard any publicity for them.

Although it's easy to say it doesn't matter (and of course none of it matters in the great scheme of things), the truth is that the viewing figures for Eurovision's single qualifying rounds (2004-2007) and semi-finals (2008) have been reasonable for BBC Three but pitiful in terms of anything on the main channels. The lack of advertising means that many people who would watch the shows miss them entirely. More importantly, it skews the UK vote horribly, because the only people watching are committed fans and the immigrant populations in this country whose own countries are taking part. They have the communication networks, through their newspapers, community radio and websites, to make a significant population ready to vote.

If there's any doubt about this, let's look at the great shame of last year's second semi-final, where the UK televote gave the maximum 12 points to Cyprus, one of the worst songs in the entire competition. Cyprus failed to qualify for the final, finishing a deserved 15th out of 19 songs, but one third of their 36 points came from us. I don't remember Wogan complaining about OUR diaspora voting, also evidenced when we gave Ireland's Donna & Joe 12 points in their 2005 qualifier, but they too failed to make the final. Low viewing figures allow our televote to be hijacked and that's a shame.

So, based on recent patterns and who's likely to be watching tomorrow, here's where I think the big semi-final points from the UK televote are going, and the reasons:

12 points - Turkey (Turks in UK.)
10 points - Sweden (Fan fave.)
8 points - Malta (We love Malta, and it's plucky Chiara again.)

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10.5.09
There's always one

Last night's Eurovision party, hosted by the Schlagerboys at the Wellington, was utterly fantastic. Much vodka, much flag-waving, much singing and many blue and yellow balloons!

There was an unwanted guest though. Here I am, trying to reverse her powers of witchcraft and make her disappear.



Photo (c) Schlagerboys 2009

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Ghost of Leigh Bowery spotted at Eurovision

9.5.09
Her time is now

Jade's first rehearsal today. Classy and well-sung. Rapturously received by objective bloggers, even those who didn't like it before. I may cry.

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Her time, it's her time!

It's Day 7 of Eurovision rehearsals in Moscow. So much is happening today.

Vladimir Putin has just paid a visit to the media centre and France's Patricia Kaas has produced a standing ovation with her first rehearsal, turning up the heat considerably on the favourites who have emerged so far.

Most of the 37 countries in the semi-finals have now finished their two rehearsals each, with the rest finishing tomorrow. This just leaves the Big 4 and hosts Russia to cram in both of their rehearsals this weekend, before the public dress rehearsals for the semis start on Monday and the real thing starts on Tuesday night. (Note to UK: we are voting in TUESDAY'S semi-final. I have to tell you this because the BBC can't be bothered. Have you seen any trailers yet?)

France is the first country of the five to rehearse. Jade is due on at 13:40 UK time, but they're running a little late, so check out OnEurope and All Kinds Of Everything some time after 14:00 for immediate reactions. I've been lapping up both of them all week. The seven people involved are doing a great job between the two blogs.

By coincidence, the UK's first rehearsal today, 9th May, comes on the eleventh anniversary of Birmingham hosting the contest, which must mean it's the first time it's fallen on a Saturday since then. We must be on a repeat of the 1998 calendar this year.

9th May is also Europe Day, and Moscow has a huge military parade to celebrate victory in Europe in WWII, which is why friends in Moscow were rather disturbed earlier in the week when the tanks trundled into town below their apartment! Their photos are here on OnEurope.

We'll be celebrating and previewing tonight, when the Schlagerboys are holding a pre-Eurovision party at the Wellington here in Brum. They'll be imposing their mp3 collection on a willing audience, before they fly out for a fleeting visit to Moscow next weekend. It should be schlagertastic!

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8.5.09
No Pride in Moscow

The stage is set for unrest and possible riots in Red Square on the day of the Eurovision final next week. The mayor of Moscow has now done what most of us thought he wouldn't dare to do this year, even though he's done it before - he has banned the Moscow lesbian and gay Pride parade. It has always been planned for Eurovision final day, with most people assuming that the glare of publicity (and the presence of so many films crews in Moscow for the contest) would prevent it being banned, as Moscow gritted its teeth and tried to appear more tolerant to Europe's media. But no. Moscow's mayor doesn't care about that. He has a homophobic agenda to maintain.

Had I been going to Moscow, I would have been looking forward to taking part in the Pride celebrations. Needless to say, the organisers of the parade say they're going ahead anyway. Previous Moscow Prides have seen protesters being beaten up by fascists while the police stood idly by, or even joined in. Saturday 16th should be interesting. I'm expecting to see plenty of Europe's schlager queens on the barricades.

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6.5.09
43

3.5.09
Mother Russia calling

Eurovision 2009 starts today, as the first Moscow rehearsals kick off this morning! Chig couldn't afford to go, but the usual suspects have made it, thankfully.

I heartily recommend that you spend the next two weeks reading the rehearsal blogs at OnEurope and All Kinds Of Everything. Work and other pressures mean there won't be a fat lot about Eurovision here on World Of Chig this year, but those two blogs by people I know kept me thoroughly entertained in 2007 when I last didn't go to the contest. I'm sure they'll be doing the same thing again.

There's plenty to read there already, including a picture of the OnEurope team's toilet, should you be concerned about their sanitation. Annoyingly, they're saying it's not that expensive in Moscow. As the money was the main reason for me not going, this is slightly galling. Hey ho. Let battle commence! Can anyone beat Norway's Belarussian to the Eurovision crown? The bookies think that only Greece can challenge Alexander Rybak. It's not worth betting on either of them. I'm keeping my fingers crossed for a Bosnia-Herzegovina win instead, because the song deserves it and Sarajevo will be a whole lot cheaper than Oslo next year. We'll see over the next fortnight. Excited!

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27.4.09
Hero Face (without alien cat face)


What do you get when you mix blonde bombshells Charlotte Perrelli and Lady GaGa? You get this fabulous mash-up, as Lady Gaga sings 'Poker Face' over the backing track of Perrelli's 'Hero' from last year's Eurovision.

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26.4.09
Number 1 is Number 1

Chart history has been made this evening, as 'Number 1' by Tinchy Stryder featuring N-Dubz makes number one in the singles chart.

Amazingly, in nearly 57 years of the UK singles chart, no song called Number 1 (or Number One) has ever become the self-fulfilling prophesy that the artists would have liked. The Tweenies and Goldfrapp came closest, both taking songs called 'Number 1' into the top ten, at #6 and #9 respectively. You won't be surprised to hear that these two and Mr Stryder's are three different songs.

Today's chart-topper is an all-London collaboration, as Tinchy Stryder hails from Bow in East London while N-Dubz are from St. John's Wood and Camden. Dappy from N-Dubz will be familiar to many TV viewers as 'that man with the stupid hat' on Never Mind The Buzzcocks. Their collaboration includes the line, "I don't understand how you're number one" and I'm sure many people will feel the same way.

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9.4.09
Hopping off

Chig is hopping off with the Easter bunny for a week away from civilisation (but in a city) in a foreign land where he don't speaka da lingo. Guess where and he might send you a postcard. (It may be the only form of communication possible anyway, given that this place may not have t'internet and a mobile signal is unlikely).

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1.4.09
192 seconds of My Time

Do you think we'll get away with 3 minutes and 12 seconds in Moscow? Twelve seconds too long is seriously pushing it.

Here's Jade Ewen's official video for 'My Time' (as they're calling it this week, at least), as revealed yesterday.

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14.3.09
Sverige, choose this tonight!

Måns Zelmerlöw - Hope & Glory



Or this, my second favourite, co-written with Frederik Kempe, as was Hope & Glory above (and Sarah Dawn Finer's song - he has three of the eleven!)

Malena Ernman - La Voix



I have narrowed down the field of eleven contenders in tonight's Melodifestivalen final to eight possible winners. It really is that wide open. I don't think Agnes, H.E.A.T. or Sofia can win, but anyone else could do it. And the juries will probably deny the public their choice once again. I won't be surprised. We'll be partying at Glitterball Mansions and I'll be cheering on Måns Zelmerlöw for a bit of Hope & Glory for himself, after he was so cruelly denied with Cara Mia - the most played song on my PC, according to my stats on last.fm.

I have a feeling that Måns may lose out narrowly again though. This could be the year that Sweden shakes off the schlager shroud and goes for the quirky song in Swedish, sung by a woman who seems slightly disturbed. It could well be Caroline af Ugglas's night. Or Sarah Dawn Finer's. Or EMD's. Or Molly's. Or anyone's really...

The finalists:

1 Måns Zelmerlöw - Hope & Glory
Schlagertastic, with hunky Måns and another tightly choreographed dance routine. One of the best breakdowns in modern pop, which makes me feel the need to get very drunk and shout it very loudly on a dancefloor. Pop perfection.

2 Caroline af Ugglas - Snälla, snälla
Slow and hypnotic, but a grower, not a shower. Strongly fancied.

3 Agnes - Love, Love, Love
Discotastic, but not strong enough to win.

4 H.E.A.T. - 1,000 Miles
Rocktastic, in that schlager-rock way that only Sweden can do.

5 Emilia - You're My World
Calm down Cilla, calm down! This is not your song of the same name. This is, however, the same Emilia who had a #5 UK hit a decade ago with Big, Big World. She likes 'world' songs, it seems. It's catchy and deserves to be in the final, Unfortunately, it's being supported by Carola and as she's the daughter of Satan, I can't go near it.

6 Alcazar - Stay The Night
A return to form for the newly-constituted Alcazar, voted straight into the final this time, but probably not strong enough, much as they deserve their turn at Eurovision. The biggest danger with this song is that if Amii Stewart is in the vicinity of Stockholm, she may rush onto the stage in some sort of Pavlovian response to the rhythm track, which steals the drum beats from Knock On Wood to magnificent effect.

7 Sarah Dawn Finer - Moving On
Classy and captivating. A worthy winner if it succeeds.

8 E.M.D. - Baby Goodbye
More Pop Idol refugees who are not exactly ugly. A great pop/cabaret performance and a catchy song.

9 Sofia - Alla
The international jury's choice, sung in Greek. Will flop, as it did in the heat before the jury rescued it. It just sounds a bit messy.

10 Molly Sandén - Så vill stjärnorna
Pure class, sung by a teenager with a voice beyond her years. One of those songs where it doesn't matter if you don't understand Swedish; it still sounds great.

11 Malena Ernman - La Voix
Popera! An amazing opera voice and an instantly hummable song. Her only weakness is the singing at the beginning, before she switches to opera, which is clearly her forte. By the end though, people will be so impressed that they'll have forgotten any initial shakiness.

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12.3.09
Public Service Announcement

If you haven't watched Deal Or No Deal for ages, today is the day to watch it. (On 4+1, More4 and channel4.com, probably.)

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26.2.09
Fabulous! Fabulous! Fabulous!

You may have missed this if you weren't watching Norwegian TV last weekend. After I wrote about Alexander Rybak's victory in the Melodi Grand Prix on Saturday night, I was invited round to Glitterball Mansions on Sunday as Norwegian TV was repeating it at teatime. (Can you imagine the BBC doing that with our final?) Knowing that the Schlagerboys had gone there with their banners, I asked my host if they'd been caught on camera. "Oh, they were in it," he replied. You mean audience shots of them waving their flags? "No, they were in it." And indeed they were. I wasn't quite prepared for this. On our national final, we get Eurovision royalty (Lulu) and, er, Duncan 'from Blue' James. Norway gets two blokes from Birmingham. But they are Eurovision royalty too. Regardez. Note how little of the English the presenter feels the need to translate into Norwegian. There are two possible reasons for this. I have decided to believe it's because most Norwegians will understand their English anyway.



Two of the SIX contestants in Your Country Needs You are now wondering if they're the two who Schlagerboy D has forgotten.

I also have a feeling that the UK probably will "stem på Norge" anyway, so the host can relax. I think every country in Europe will "stem på Norge" on 16 May and it could easily be douze points from us.

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No time left for romancing

Another person from the list of UK Number One hitmakers has shuffled off their mortal coil. Mrs Slocombe's pussy and Mr Papadopoulos have yet to comment.

RIP Wendy Richard
(1943-2009). (Mike Sarne is still alive.)

'Come Outside' - Mike Sarne with Wendy Richard - #1 - 1962


This knocked Elvis Presley's 'Good Luck Charm' off the top spot and stayed there for two weeks from late June 1962. Wendy Richard, bless her, thought it was six weeks, as we've mentioned before.

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24.2.09
Queer As Folk 10 - how it started for Chig

For today's little shimmy down memory lane (AKA Canal Street) to celebrate Queer As Folk's tenth anniversary yesterday, I shall recount the tale of how I ever knew about it to start with. It's one of those stories which could so easily not have happened, which would then not have set in train a whole load of other things which have happened to me in the last ten years.

Rewind to January 1998. I was on holiday on Gran Canaria with two friends, staying at Villas Blancas. There was a lovely guy called Matt in one of the neighbouring apartments. We hadn't had very much of a chat until one day when I lost my friends on the beach. (Look, one sand dune looks pretty much like another, okay?) I had to come back to the apartment in a taxi with no money and no shoes as my friends had the bag with our stuff in. Luckily, I was able to borrow money for a taxi from Matt and, as I was also without the apartment keys, I sat and chatted to him outside his apartment until my friends appeared. We stayed in touch after that holiday by e-mail, so later in the year, when Matt was working as script editor on a new gay drama series, he knew that I was writing for Gay Times. He suggested me going up to Manchester for a night shoot, so I could meet the cast and the writer. I put this to the editor, sensing that this was going to be quite a newsworthy programme for the gay press, and one weekend in October 1998, off I toddled up to Manchester to meet Matt and observe the night shoot. But I hadn't quite come prepared for what followed.

Find out why later this week.

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Swiss (rock and) roll

Chig has a new favourite in this year's Eurovision. It probably won't excite a Eurovision audience very much, but I think this is fantastic! Basle band Lovebugs have been going for fifteen years and have plucked the title track from their tenth album, 'The Highest Heights', to become their country's 51st Eurovision entry. The shimmering guitar at the start sounds a bit like early U2, with vocals that remind me a lot of The Psychedelic Furs (and it's taken a frustrating 24 hours for me to work out who it was!) It doesn't have much of a verse/chorus structure, or even a key change, but still manages to be catchy. The best Swiss entry since Vanilla Ninja in 2005 - and they were Estonian. Allez la Suisse!


Eurovision 2009 - Switzerland - 'The Highest Heights' - Lovebugs


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23.2.09
Queer As Folk 10

Tuesday 23 February 1999.

It was ten years ago tonight that the first episode of Queer As Folk was broadcast on Channel 4. I had been lucky enough to visit the set on two separate occasions in the Autumn of 1998, to watch the filming and interview the stars (and a certain writer) for what turned out to be my first (and so far only) cover story for Gay Times magazine. You can't imagine how excited I was as I sat down ten years ago tonight, but not because I wondered what it was like. I had already seen it! I couldn't wait to find out the reaction of the press and friends and colleagues the next day. I already knew what was coming, because I had been lucky enough to be invited down to London by Russell T Davies some time before, where I had watched an exclusive screening of the first two episodes in one of those preview cinemas in Soho where people like Jonathan Ross and Mark Kermode watch films before the rest of us mere mortals. We just had Boyd Hilton, who wasn't very well-known at the time. I loved those first two episodes, but they also burst my bubble somewhat, as friends of mine know only too well. You see, I was supposed to be in episode one. I had been filmed for it. I would have been the first face on screen after Nathan, right at the beginning of the opening episode. But...as I realised while watching in that Soho cinema, my big moment ended up on the cutting room floor, so I had to ask Russell T Davies afterwards why. I was gutted.

I'm going to drag out this tenth anniversary for the whole week, as I have a few stories to tell. If I'd had a blog at the time, they would probably have been on it, but World Of Chig was still nearly three years away at the time. Please feel free to share your memories and experiences of Queer As Folk. In the meantime, why not start off by reading the text of the Gay Times article which I wrote for that early 1999 issue. I've only just discovered that it is reproduced on a website dedicated to Charlie Hunnam, who played Nathan, so I've copied it, taken out the typos and Americanisms that they had inserted (the cheek!) and pasted it below. I've actually enjoyed reading it again myself. There'll be more QAF stuff all week.

Coming later this week:

Why QAF was responsible for Chig never drinking a certain brand of lager ever again.
Who was responsible for Chig being told off on set.
The strange story of the Nivea hand creme (or was it)?
How QAF led to Chig being treated to a meal by the Daily Mail. (Yikes!)
How QAF saw Chig get a boyfriend. Yes, really! Chig has had a boyfriend!
The wild QAF party which led to naughties in a London hotel, on a train and in Chig's house with a member of the QAF cast. On second thoughts, we'll leave that bit out.

Here's the Gay Times article on Queer As Folk that I wrote for the January 1999 issue.

Folk Like Us

The television event of the New Year will be Channel 4's ground-breaking gay drama series, Queer As Folk. Written by a gay man, the eight-part series follows the lives of three young gay men in and around Manchester's scene. With one of the three central characters being only 15, the issue of the age of consent will be tackled head-on. But this is no tub-thumping drama, as [Chig] found out when he visited the set to talk to the writer and the actors.

Think 'gay television drama' series and what springs to mind? Tales of the City and, well, that's about it. Now add 'British' to the equation and what are you left with? Nothing, that's what. But all will change next month when Queer As Folk struts onto our screens. This is a tale of a different city - Manchester. And whereas in the past we've had to make do with token gay characters in the soaps, some of whom we don't even recognise as our own (Tony Hills in Eastenders for example), this is a TV drama with familiar characters, targeted at a contemporary gay audience. Queer As Folk is different. This eight-part series is gay drama, by a gay writer - the sort of programme that we always felt Channel Four should provide, but which it's never quite delivered. It shows gay characters out on the scene, at home, with friends and family, laughing and loving. Lesbian character Romey (Esther Hall), for example, has a girlfriend, a lesbian lodger, and even - gasp! - a baby. It's a situation you don't see too often in TV drama. In other words, the characters in Queer As Folk do all the things that you and I know and take for granted as real life, but which the straight telly world still sees as weird.

Russell T Davies, the series' writer and creator, says he didn't set out with a political agenda for the drama. "Channel Four, set modern day and gay - that was the brief, so off I went." That's not to say that it didn't raise some interesting and controversial topics, but the thing that Daily Mail types will find so shocking is that all of this is played as just being so goddamn normal; no apologies but no preaching, either. The series focuses on a diverse group of gay (and some lesbian and straight) friends living in Manchester. Central characters Stuart and Vince are both in their late twenties and have been best mates since school. Their lives are changed by the arrival of 15-year-old Nathan, fresh on the scene and full of the wide-eyed naïvete, trepidation and unbridled enthusiasm that many of us remember from our own coming-out days. We follow the lives of these friends - around the scene, in their homes, at work and, for Nathan, at school.

The whole series has been filmed in and around Manchester, with weeks of night shoots in the gay village, making the locals very aware that something is going on. Indeed, some of them are in it, as the street and club scenes required lots of realistic extras. Russell T Davies, whose previous credits include ITV's period hotel drama, The Grand, has deliberately steered clear of writing an issue-based drama. But with a 15-year-old lead who has a sex life, the age of consent question is ever-present. Although Nathan has all the nervousness and insecurities of any teenager coming out, he's very clear about his sexuality and knows exactly what he wants to do with it. It's a message that those opposed to an equal age of consent would do well to take in. This might be only a drama, but there's nothing "pretend" about Nathan's feelings and emotions.

On my first visit to the set - a wet, cold October night in Canal Street - I ask Russell whether viewers will find Queer As Folk uplifting and celebratory, or does it just normalise gay life? "It is a drama, so it is uplifting and celebratory in places, because I'm not setting out to do a documentary. That would just be eight episodes of people sitting in Via Fossa having a drink. I think it gets political naturally, because it's an entirely gay drama, it's got a focus that makes it political. And there are moments in the last episodes..." he tails off, reluctant to give too much away. "It's making a statement in itself," he continues. "What it's not is issue-based, because that's dull drama anyway. I do think that's, like, infant-school drama. You get a lot of gay stuff that is issue-based, and that's because it's an emerging genre - there hasn't been much gay drama."

Our conversation is interrupted by one of the crew asking Russell what cigarettes to buy for Nathan. "Benson" is Russell's immediate answer. "You see the detail," he jokes. On what basis was that decision made, I ask? "Artistic," he laughs. "Marlboro Lights are too gay. Silk Cut are too middle-aged - they're for when you've given up smoking. It's Benson, but 10, not 20."

Nathan is the youngest of Queer As Folk's three main characters. He is played by Charlie Hunnam, who describes him as, "a 15-year-old lad who starts off quite shy and not very confident at all, a bit mixed up. Through the eight programmes, he progresses into quite a manipulating, and much more confident and cultivated, kind of gay lad on the Manchester scene." He learns about life from Stuart, Vince and the others, while dragging around his faithful sidekick and confidante, Donna - his best friend from school.

When Charlie's real-life mum was 15, one of her best friends came-out to her, and she went through the coming-out process with him, not easy in Newcastle 25 years ago, so Charlie has had useful motherly insight into the relationship between his character and his best mate. He hasn't told his Mum about absolutely everything that playing the rôle involves, though. Some of the scenes may test her open-mindedness, but that's not his concern: "It's really a fantastic role for me, because I get to play both ends of the spectrum - from shy and withdrawn at the beginning, to screaming queen at the end." How much of the character is like the real Charlie? "I think he's like me in that he is a young lad who doesn't want to do the normal kind of things in life. He's not really interested in school and all that kind of shit, which I never was, you know? He's just more interested in his dreams and what he wants to be doing and he doesn't let anything get in the way of that. That aspect is very like me but, well, I'm not gay to begin with, that's one quite major difference, but I understood the character straight away, and after talking to Russell."

Charlie is only just 18 and manages to play three years under his age very well, partly because he looks younger. He describes himself as "a relative newcomer to the game" of acting - he's originally from Newcastle, and took the traditional route into TV for any Geordie lad; via the BBC's long-running school soap, Byker Grove. But it seems unlikely that Charlie will be following the career path of those other Byker Grove graduates, Ant and Dec: Charlie is serious about acting. "I'm enjoying what I'm doing now," he tells me, "so I'll give this a go for a while." He's been "seeing a few people" about possible parts after Queer As Folk and says, "I think I'll keep on acting as long as it wants me."

His break into acting happened by chance. "I was in a shoe shop," he explains, "just being really stupid with my friends and trying on some shoes, and I just asked this lady - I had absolutely no idea who she was - what she thought of my trainers. She was kind of taken aback and just looked at me. I thought, 'oh my God', because she kept looking at me. And then I went to the till to buy them and she came over and said, 'Have you ever thought about acting?' It turned out she was the Production Manager for Byker Grove, and she took me to meet the director." That led to Charlie being in six episodes, and he hasn't looked back since, moving on to a BBC and Disney collaboration, Microsoaps; a kids' series which he describes as "quite funky, dealing with real issues but in a kind of light way". He's also done fashion modeling, including the Clothes Show Live.

It's inevitable that many young gay men, whether they're out or not, will look on Nathan's experiences as a model of coming out. Lots of young gay men will fancy him, too. So has he thought about the responsibility that comes with being a... "Gay icon?" he interjects. Actually, I was going to say "rôle model", but yes, Charlie has thought about it. "A few people had raised that point with me," he says, "and I just thought, Russell's been in the game so long, on the scene, and he's such a fantastic writer. I'll put all my trust completely in him and what he's written and how the character is. So in that respect," he laughs, "Russell takes full responsibility." He doesn't necessarily recommend that young guys follow in Nathan's footsteps: "I wouldn't suggest that 15-year-old lads should go out and pick up 30-year-old guys on the street, who they've never met, and go back to their place, you know?"

The man in question (he's actually 29 and dreading 30) is Stuart, played by Aidan Gillen, most recently seen in the British feature film, Mojo. Aidan describes his character as "a very confident, slightly enigmatic, sexy guy". Craig Kelly, playing his best mate Vince, describes Stuart's sexuality as "open, raw and in-your-face". Stuart is confidence personified. Vince is more sensitive and less sure of himself. He's another 29-year-old gay man, who's obsessed with Doctor Who almost as much as he's in love with Stuart, his best friend since they were both 14. It's unrequited love, though; and Stuart takes advantage of Vince's good nature. Craig says that Vince is "happy to be in the shadow of Stuart", and that he is not the archetypal shagger, because he doesn't have the confidence," adding, "It's left to the sexy ones to do all the shagging." However, despite his lack of self-confidence, it's clear that gay viewers are really going to warm to Vince and want to take him under their wings. When I ask Craig if he, too, is prepared for becoming a rôle model or lust object to gay men when the series is broadcast, he says "it's a surreal idea" that one can't really prepare for, and anyway, that's not the reason why he does the job. "But it is part of the job," he continues, "and if it happens, then that's flattering and fair enough, but I don't really take that seriously. I think people will really, really like Vince as a character and I think that some people mind find him quite... quite attractive". Craig says this last sentence slowly, choosing his words carefully and being unnecessarily modest. He talks as though the attractiveness of his character has nothing to do with his own boyish good looks. As he finishes speaking, we both laugh because this truly is surreal, sitting in a trailer talking to a good-looking bloke about how attractive he is, and both of us pretending it's someone else. Craig used to be in Casualty, as did Jason Merrells, formerly Matt the receptionist at Holby General, who plays Vince's friend Phil.

Indeed, avid soap watchers will have fun spotting the famous faces in Queer As Folk, with Coronation Street represented by Denise Black (erstwhile hairdresser and mother of Ken Barlow's child) and Lee Warburton (more recently the drug-dealing Tony), and Neighbours by Peter O'Brien (Shane). This line-up is testimony to the strong script and the pulling power of the production company, Red. This is Red's first production since the company was set up earlier this year by producer Nicola Shindler, whose impressive CV includes Hillsborough, Cracker and Our Friends in the North. She has brought with her director Charles McDougall, who also worked on Cracker and Hillsborough as well as the much-missed Between The Lines, a series which included several lesbian and gay storylines.

Not so long ago, aspiring young actors would have worried about playing some of these gay rôles, even if their agents had dared to put them up for the parts. Those attitudes are changing, though, and these actors, whatever their own sexuality, see this series as the opportunity that it is - juicy rôles, of a kind never seen before; a kind of script that's never been written before; all brought to life by producers and directors with a proven track record in quality drama.

My second visit to the set coincides with the filming of a party scene in Stuart's flat, a loft-type apartment, with that 'contemporary seventies' look, very brown and cream, very wallpaper*. The room, which has plenty of exposed red brickwork, is dominated by a semi-circular chocolate-brown vinyl settee. There are huge white mushroom lamps on the corner units and two sets of white fairy lights zig-zagging across wooden frames. To underline Stuart's shameless ostentation, there is a vending machine in one corner, filled with chocolate and crisps. This luxurious set, which includes Stuart's kitchen, bedroom and bathroom, was created from scratch in the old mill building which used to house the nightclub Sankey's Soap. No expense has been spared in making the flat look pretentious enough for Stuart, who works as an account manager for an advertising agency - when he isn't shagging. (Sometimes he even manages to combine the two activities, such is his confidence and success.)

As I walk into the "flat", the "realness" of the set only emphasises the weirdness of the scene in front of me. The room is full of people partying, dressed up, streamers everywhere, but something is missing - there's no noise. Sarah Harding, directing this episode, explains that all the party sounds are put on later because "it's much easier to add background than it is to take it away". The technique really tests the acting abilities of the extras when they film scenes where the party guests are dancing. As "action" is called, a few seconds of 'Finally' are played, and then the cast are on their own - shaking their butts to an imaginary beat, or, if they're clever, singing along to Ce Ce Peniston in their heads. It looks very odd.

Slumped on a sofa between takes, I chat with cute young Jonathan Natynczyk, who plays Nathan's mate Dazz. Helpfully, he informs me that he has "very good looks and a big dick, but that's not actually shown on screen". At that stage, he had still to film a bed scene, which may have involved a little nudity, so the proof may be there for all to see.

Also on set is Denise Black. She plays Hazel, Vince's Mum, who is, on the face of it, a bit mad. She's more likely than her gay son to be doing karaoke at the New Union. Denise describes her character as "massively supportive, but not the claustrophobic, protective type. She's a good-time girl, but she's got a wonderfully good heart." When I ask Denise how much of the character is like her, she puts on her best luvvie voice and gushes, mockingly: "Everything that's wonderful about her is just like me". She praises Russell T Davies, saying he is "as exciting a writer as I can imagine. We all feel excited about this because it's not like any series there has been before."

Night shoots on the streets of Manchester in Autumn dampened that enthusiasm at times, though - inevitably, it rained on some of them. (The crew presumed that it would sooner or later, and sprayed Canal Street with water even when the weather was dry, to ensure continuity with the nights when the rain was real.) Twelve hours outside on a night shoot, on consecutive nights, really tests the patience of actors, crew and drag queens alike.

For the extras, the scene queens and drag queens hoping for their moment of stardom, the reality of showbiz hits home - it's boring and repetitive. If you're lucky, your fifteen minutes of fame will, in reality, be less than a second on screen, and your own mother and close friends might just recognise you if they put the video on freeze-frame. Still, you have to admire their dedication, and I know, because on my visit to the set I became one of those extras. Between shots of us trolling along Canal Street for the umpteenth time, we relieved the tedium by making up our own, increasingly complicated, subplots, in which we swapped boyfriends, and flirted with different men in every scene. Shame that it will be lost on the viewing public, but it kept us amused.

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