Can it really be Tuesday? Astonishingly, Saturday's Making Your Mind Up is still making the news. I was gobsmacked to see this on the front page of the Daily Mirror today. It's not as if yesterday was the fourth anniversary of the invasion of Iraq, or Gordon Brown has a budget to deliver tomorrow. Oh no, this is far more important. Now I don't expect Daily Mirror journalists to subscribe to Eurovision messageboards, or even to have read this on Schlagerblog last Thursday, but here's a response to the Mirror's 'revelation' that Scooch had backing singers:

We already knew!

The reason we knew is that Chig's showbiz wife, Nicki French, was reportedly going to be one of those singers, until she told the Schlagerboys on Friday that she wasn't. She was apparently dumped in favour of backing singers who could dance as well. (Not that we're saying the lovely Nicki can't dance, but you know what they mean; people picked for their dancing, rather than their lungs.) On Saturday, when Scooch appeared on screen, I told my Mum and sister this little story, then surveyed the stage, realised that we couldn't see the backing singers and said that the BBC must have changed their minds and stuck them in the wings after all. These things happen. It's what rehearsals are for. If the backing singers detract from the look of the act, shove them out of the way. It seems fair enough to me. We then forgot about it, until today's story broke.

There's a related story to this from Eurovision history. When Dana International won in Birmingham in 1998, she had three fairly slim women doing backing vocals just behind her, stage left, but what you could hardly see on TV was the fourth backing singer, who was rather larger, stage right, with a mic stand all on her own. She's not even lit at the start of the song and there's not a single close-up of her. It's quite possible she was the best singer on that stage, but she was judged not to be so telegenic. Perhaps she couldn't dance. Perhaps the Israeli delegation just thought she was too fat. Who knows? (Watch it here.)

Today's cover story is here on the Mirror's website. It's pathetic, instigated by the sour grapes of Justin Hawkins and Brian Harvey. (Either of them could have had backing singers if they'd wanted, hidden or visible. In both cases, they might have been a welcome distraction.) Scooch performed with two backing singers, just as they will be able to do at Eurovision. It will sound the same. The performance we saw will be the performance they can give in Helsinki (although I hope the Union flags will be gone, as we don't want it to look like 'British Imperialism all over the world'). No one was conned. Let's move on.

Labels: Eurovision 2007, MYMU, Scooch

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Er, no, sorry, it's actually Scooch.



Chig has woken up still shuddering at the embarrassment and horror of last night's Making Your Mind Up announcement. (I also have 'Loch Lomond' going around in my head, in a homage to Cyndi.) Poor, poor Cyndi. Three seconds of elation before she's told that she hasn't won after all. Cruel.

On a positive note, Scooch's performances were excellent and the two 'superfinal' contestants, Scooch and Cyndi, were exactly the two who I'd bet on, so I was happy with that. Five quid at 6-1 on Scooch equals 30 pounds, thank you very much. It would have been £45 for Cyndi though and she also deserved to win.

Brian Harvey and Liz McClarnon shouldn't have been too surprised that they were the first to walk; Dancing On Ice hadn't finished until after they had performed, so I doubt if many people saw them.

Labels: Eurovision 2007, MYMU

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We're hoping for a French win today, especially the 12.5% of my blood that is French, but that's for Cyndi in Making Your Mind Up, not the French rugby team in the Six Nations! There should also be an England rugby win, for Kyran Bracken in the Dancing On Ice final. The bookies have him as 1-13 favourite, meaning it's not worth betting. You'd have to bet 13 pounds to win one back, plus your stake. (Thank you to Tara Palmer-Tomkinson for winning me £8.13 profit last night on a five pound bet which I placed when there were four people left in the Fame Academy. I will do the decent thing and give it to Comic Relief.)

My 37.5% Irishness would like to wish you a Happy St. Patrick's Day. Happy Mothers' Day for tomorrow too. It's all go this weekend, as we spend most of today in front of the telly for rugby, MYMU and DOI and then out tomorrow for a Mothers' Day meal with the extended family.

It's been hard to avoid tonight's Making Your Mind Up already this morning. Firstly, Justin Hawkins was interviewed about it on Radio 5 Live. (Today is also his 32nd birthday. I hope he doesn't get the present he's clearly expecting.)

Then Popworld on Channel 4 had all the MYMU contenders in a lecture theatre situation. I only caught the end of it, but I think they were being given 'Eurovision lessons'. Alex Zane showed them a clip of Daz Sampson performing last year and asked them all if they could see what was wrong with it. Justin Hawkins replied, "Apart from him being a talentless waste of skin?". Ooh, get you!

(Popworld is repeated at 08:55 GMT tomorrow, Sunday, on C4.)

Justin Hawkins was also singing on Comic Relief's Top Gear programme last night, as well as appearing as a panellist on The Wright Stuff earlier in the week.

The only other contender I've seen is Brian Harvey in the audience for Fame Academy about a week ago. If Hawkins & Brown win tonight, I can't help thinking the others only have themselves to blame for not trying a bit harder with the media.

Have you seen or heard any of the other MYMU acts publicising themselves?

Fingers crossed for Cyndi tonight, whose odds are shortening rapidly with the bookies (according to Radio 5 Live) as people gradually realise she's our best chance of success in Helsinki.

Labels: Eurovision 2007, MYMU

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So, what are they like in their full versions? Chig gives the six MYMU hopefuls a couple of spins each (or whatever it is you do with MP3s) and evaluates each one after just two hearings, as Mr and Ms Public will have to do on 17 March.

You may be surprised by the conclusion. Chig would normally be surprised if there were any conclusions, but this time he has made a clear choice.


Big Bro Thang - Big Brovaz

I’m immediately prejudiced against this song, because I just don’t see the point of listening to a tune that is all about the artist, except when it’s funny, like Silvia Nott. It’s the exact opposite of what produces a Eurovision winner. (Not that we’re in any position to consider winning until we give Europe a reason to vote for the Big 4 countries, but that’s a matter that I will return to on another day.) Leaving aside Lordi, which was all about theatre, recent Eurovision successes have all been positive, uplifting and/or inclusive. Hearing a group singing about themselves just seems daft and self-indulgent in any context, but it’s magnified a million times at Eurovision, to a level where it seems wholly inappropriate.

So, trying to be fair and getting over that enormous hurdle, this is actually a good song. It manages to sound poppy, atmospheric and electro, and even the rap isn’t completely horrible. It scores highly on the catchiness scale too. There are even bits in it which sound like Evanescence’s ‘Bring Me To Life’, which is not quite what you’d expect from Big Brovaz. This is being released as a single anyway, so if nothing else, expect it to be the biggest non-winning hit single from a UK selection since Deuce made number 10 in 1995 with the third-placed ‘I Need You’.


They Don’t Make ‘Em Like They Used To – Hawkins & Brown

With an insistent, banging, Boxerbeat of a backing track all the way through, this is a belter, but it does sound a bit like a competition between Justin and Beverlei to see who can screech the highest. There’s some wonderful screaming at times, but this is one of those ‘high risk’ songs which you just know could be awful on the Eurovision stage, even though they’re both amazing singers.

The middle eight puts me off a bit too. There’s some great brass but what the heck are Justin and Beverlei going to do while the band plays (on the backing track)? Oh crikey, I see it now. He’s going to strip off his suit and reveal the lycra one-piece, isn’t he? There’s also a bit of guitar work which could well be ‘played’ by Justin himself. The song fizzles out a bit at the end and needs to finish with much more impact.

Also, the line “you don’t see crap and shit like that” rules this one out of Eurovision for me (and a teatime audience, surely?) I admit I am hooked quite quickly on this as a good, upbeat song, but at the moment I just can’t imagine it at Eurovision.


I Can – Brian Harvey

Written by Brian in 2005 when he was recovering from his bizarre car accident (when he somehow managed to run himself over with his own car), this is a great, uplifting ballad. There are some Elton John moments on the ivories, and a great a cappella section which will really grab the audience’s attention. It has a wonderfully inspirational lyric and Brian does it straight, as it should be, without any of the vocal embellishments that sometimes tempt him. Even in its 4m 11s version, this is very good, and can probably be given even more impact in the obligatory three minute edit.

However, this has been circulated in 2005, by Popbitch for one, and even if it has been rearranged, it breaks the rules by being published before October 2006. Perhaps we shouldn’t pin our hopes on this one, but Teenage Life broke exactly the same rule and nothing happened, so maybe we can do what we like.


(Don’t It Make You) Happy! - Liz McClarnon

Not to be confused with another UK national final tune, Don’t It Make You Feel So Good, which was Alberta’s effort in the 1998 Great British Song Contest. The song is the bastard son of a preacher man but just about manages to plough its own furrow as a bouncy pop tune which is likeable enough, but not a vote winner. There’s not enough of an immediate hook or anything novel about it. Liz fulfils the positivity criterion by singing about happiness, but it’s not enough. This is my least favourite of the six.

‘Ev’rybody wants to fly’, sings Liz, which leads us nicely to….


Flying The Flag (For You) – Scooch

“The duration will be three minutes exactly.” Brilliant.

If only it hadn’t all been done before, I would unreservedly be recommending this. Scooch even look like Sestre in their official MYMU photo, so the comparisons are obvious, but five years is a long time in Eurovision and Sestre weren’t even singing about flying. This lot definitely are, in a song which could be adopted as the theme for British Airways, were it not for the innuendo. Well, I say innuendo, but there’s a line spoken by one of the 'cabin crew' guys in this which goes “Would you like something to suck on for landing sir?” It’s more of a single entendre, isn’t it?

This is poptastic and very much like they never went away, as far as Scooch’s body of work is concerned. It doesn’t feel like Natalie Scooch ever has been away, to be honest, as she has trodden the gay club boards for many a year as a solo performer. I’ve lost track of how many times I’ve seen her at Pride/Mardi Gras festivals, and she can sing really well. Russ Scooch hasn’t been away much either, as he’s been working as a TV presenter, before dressing up as a girl for Nathan Moore and trying to pass as one third of a girlband in the TV show ‘Girls Will Be Boys’.

The whole three minute flight has great potential to be an act, which is what’s needed to stand out in Eurovision these days. Following in the footsteps of the Swedish witch last year, there could be some flag-waving too. There’s a clue in the title. I’d be rather uncomfortable if they were waving the Union Flag though. Perhaps the rainbow flag would be more appropriate?!

This is a tongue-in-cheek laugh, with phrases like “flying high in Amsterdam”, “cruising in the sky” and "some salted nuts, sir?". It namechecks the host city (Helsinki), one of the newcomers’ capitals (Prague) and a few other place names along the way, in a blatant attempt to attract votes from Paris, Berlin and Tallinn.

It even has the line, “Your exits are here, here, and here”, which Sestre did as part of their routine, but who cares? It’s a delightful bit of pop froth with a catchy tune and this would be a fabulous UK entry.

Which leaves us with the one unknown act in this year’s selection.


I’ll Leave My Heart – Cyndi

“Oh I’ll take the high notes and you take the low, and my heart will go on as you raise me up, oh Danny boy, as by the bonny, bonny banks of Loch Lomond we’ll go sailing.”

Let’s just say there are a few influences evident in this song. But - and it’s a very important ‘but’ - it’s as good a song as you would expect it to be if you cobbled together all of the best elements of the above songs. French singer Cyndi evidently has a great voice, which ranges from soft and gentle to powerful, with a big note near the end and a long note at the very end which would have us all on the edge of our seats, hoping that she makes it. (It’s called 'The Lindsay D Moment' in Eurovision circles.)

The sweeping strings (and harp?) on this are absolutely fantastic. You want the return of chansonnerie? You want a big, breast-beating ballad? I think I do. This is epic, beautiful and powerful and is my clear favourite if we want to do as well as possible in Helsinki.

We don’t generally vote for the underdog unless there’s a huge amount of novelty involved (ie. Daz Sampson last year). But could the relative fame of the other five acts mean that they all cancel each other out and allow this unknown to go sailing through the pack, voted for by all those without the vested interest of fandom? I hope so. This is my choice. I think it’s time for the UK to retread the path of Garlick (but with an even stronger song) and aim for a respectable equal third.

This is the strongest selection of songs of the four MYMUs so far, and the Beeb is to be congratulated on getting such quality, with five known names and a talented unknown, with not a TV talent show contestant in sight. Perhaps we could all pretend we haven't heard the Scooch song, and just save them for next year.

Labels: Eurovision 2007, MYMU, reviews

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Brian Harvey - forced out of East 17 after giving too much information in a radio interview about his E usage.

Big Brovaz - sacked one of their members after a 'drugs scandal'.

Justin Hawkins - forced out of his own brother's band and admitted to cocaine addiction.

Welcome to Making Your Mind Up!


Liz McClarnon, Scooch and Cyndi - never been near any drugs in their lives.

It's interesting to note that neither the BBC's press release this morning nor the BBC News coverage mentioned a date. Most of us had assumed that it would be 10 March because it can't be this weekend (3 March) as it's too late. All countries have to submit their songs at the Eurovision Heads of Delegation meeting on Monday 12 March, so that only left Saturday 10 March (when there was a MYMU shaped hole in the schedule as of last week) or possibly Sunday 11 March.

Tonight though, this BBC profile of the contestants reveals the date to be 17 March! Have we been given 'special dispensation' to submit our song late? (UPDATE: Yes, we have.) This page also reveals that Lordi will be there, keeping up the tradition of the Eurovision winner appearing in all four MYMUs. Lordi aren't appearing at any other national finals, unlike previous winner Helena Paparizou, who toured quite a few last year. There'll be no more queuing in the cold outside TV Centre; this time the show is in a studio in Maidstone, with an audience of a thousand and a 'new look' that includes ditching Natasha Kaplinky-plonky and her fabulous shoes in favour of last year's UK vote-giver Fearne Cotton. (Who can forget her 'metal' hand gesture as she gave Lordi our douze points?) The male presenter looks vaguely familiar. He should be pleased that the show is taking place on St. Paddy's Day, especially as it's also the final day of the Six Nations rugby union championship, which will probably see Ireland sealing their victory on the best possible date.

So, which song's your winner?

Links:
Listen to clips of all the songs on each artist's page.
BBC press release.
BBC News story.
BBC News - contestant profiles.
BBC News - Eurovision hopefuls rate their chances.

Labels: Eurovision 2007, MYMU

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I must apologise for a shameful omission yesterday. We neglected to mention that Chig's favourite living sixties icon, Sandie Shaw, was celebrating her 60th birthday. A belated Happy Birthday, your Eurovision-winning goddessness.

In a welcome reversal of the whole present-giving thing, Sandie has something for us, and it's not cakes. On her refreshingly first-person official website, there's a free download available. Not just any old free download, oh no. Dagenham's finest export (apart from the cars and the girl pipers) has 're-imagined' (my word, not hers) her finest hour and transformed Puppet On A String into something rather more laid back than it was in 1967. Now called 'Puppet's Got Brand New String', it is beautiful, and very soothing if you've just been listening to the Bulgarian wailing and throbbing (below). The intro sounds a little bit like 'Eternal Flame' in its Atomic Kitten version, which brings us nicely to...

Tomorrow, when Auntie Beeb has promised we will find out at last which lucky pupsters are volunteering for the firing line to have their music careers ended in Helsinki in May. Some of the speculation over who's in Making Your Mind Up IV has stepped well over the border into ridiculous territory. Most of the rumours are rounded up here. We'll also throw in the The Puppini Sisters, the almost forgotten Big Brovaz and a reformed Scooch (when what we really want is Deuce again), but we know it won't be Morrissey, Daz Sampson again or Billie Piper. However, there have been no denials from ex-pop groupers Brian Harvey (two solo hits, 2001) and Liz McClarnon (one solo hit, 2006), to continue the Atomic Kitten connection from above, so draw your own conclusions. There are also reasons for thinking that Queentastic with a Thomas G:son song may not be a complete flight of fantasy, but we'll see.

You'd be amazed how any people have sidled up to me in the last few weeks and asked me if I have any gossip on MYMU. You would think that I write about the contest for a well-known magazine, or that the producer is my ex-boyfriend's cousin and that the said ex-boyfriend stayed over at Chig Mansions last week. Actually, that's all true. But no, I'm privy to nothing. This is a very late announcement indeed, just ten days before the show is televised (if it's 10 March) and with 23 countries' songs already chosen and out there in the ether. (Indeed, Belarus's entrant, Dmitry Koldun, has almost completed his world tour of national finals to promote his excellent song. I've seen him on the telly/internet in programmes from Ireland and Spain, and he was the much needed interval act in the Montenegrin final on Sunday.) The Beeb's delay has only led to fans speculating that we're either in desperation territory or that someone fabulous is going to be announced.

Funnily enough, Liz McClarnon is no stranger to the UK's national selection programme, as the regular reader may remember. Four years ago, she was snapped with yours truly at the aftershow party for the last ever 'A Song For Europe'. However, I don't think that the phrase 'friend of Jemini' is going to do her too many favours, so I think she'll be playing down the connection this time.

For the record, although the inclusion of Brian Harvey opens up a debate on the morality of who we have representing us - it's already started in various Eurovision fora, as if no one who has sung for the UK before has ever taken drugs - what may surprise some people is that he really can sing. He impressed me enormously doing a gig at the Nightingale a few years ago. If the photos of that night weren't locked away on the hard drive of my dismantled PC, I'd be showing you some of them now. You'll have to make do with Liz and Chig instead.

Fingers crossed for something good tomorrow.

Labels: Brian Harvey, Eurovision 2007, Jemini, Liz McClarnon, MYMU, Queentastic, Sandie Shaw

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No news is good news, so they say. But Auntie Beeb has been unusually tight-lipped about whatever may be happening to choose our Eurovision song this year. It's a very special year, as it's the UK's 50th entry (and the tenth anniversary of our last win, but as we had a gap of sixteen years between the last two victories, let's not get too hung up on this one).

However, news has emerged today that...oooh let me check that again. Yes, the news is that 'there will be some news soon'. Great. But at least we know it will definitely be called Making Your Mind Up again. They haven't called it UK50, which was my suggestion, which leaves that title nicely available for World Of Chig to use as planned next month for what promises to be a VERY EXCITING INTERACTIVE PROJECT which will be needing your assistance. I claim copyright now on that title, and if someone creative could make me a little 'UK50' logo, like a button badge, with a 50 on the Union Flag, or something similar, that would be very nice. Now all I have to do is learn how to edit MP3s.

In the meantime, if you're in a 'music and voting' mood, now would be a good time to check out Troubled Diva's fab Which Decade Is Tops For Pops? extravaganza, which returns this week for its annual outing. We've only had numbers 10, 9 and 8 so far. You can catch up easily and help to decide, scientifically, which of the last five decades is the most poptabulous, musically speaking. You can also get carried away and leave inappropriately long and gratuitously offensive comments about some of the artists and songs. Like I have.

Start here with the number 10s.

Labels: Eurovision 2007, MYMU, UK50, WDITFP?

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News 24 running out of stories
Originally uploaded by Thoroughly Good.

They're right out of correct facts as well. Just where exactly did Daz Sampson come fifth last year? (Look closely at the caption.) It certainly wasn't in Eurovision, where he finished nineteenth. And a note to the subtitler. It's spelt 'Jemini'.

On a positive note, this is my friend Dean being interviewed yesterday on BBC News 24. Last seen by me at the Schlagerboys' Eurovision party on Christmas Eve Eve. Oh, the media circles in which we move! Very handsome and authoritative he looks too. No idea what he said.

This is the second in a continuing series called 'photos of people I know being interviewed on News 24, which Jon took of the office TV and which I've linked to from Jon's flickr page'. This time, I have shamelessly used his title as a header too, because it made me laugh. Thanks Jon.

Because Jon is an intellectual type, he was also listening to something called Radio 4 last night, in which the Morrissey for Eurovision 'news' 'story' was elevated to the level of high culture by being discussed on Front Row, which is apparently an 'arts' programme. I understand that Birmingham's most excellent (resident) music journo Stuart Maconie (whose book, Cider With Roadies, I am currently reading) gave Mozza the big thumbs up. We can all listen to it on the Listen Again thingy here. (Go to Front Row in the alphabetical list, then click on 'Tue'. It's 25 minutes in, if you want to skip forward.) I would be doing this right now if I didn't have one hand eye on Jesse Metcalfe's return in Desperate Housewives.

LATER: I've listened now. Excellent little piece from Mr. Maconie. He has a wonderful turn of phrase (as evidenced in the book, which I highly recommend). I particularly liked the idea of a "low level furore" and his description of Daz Sampson's Teenage Life as "a Balamory version of gangsta rap".

And yes, the "cultural bric-a-brac" of my own teenage life exactly matched the indicators that Stuart describes. I still have one of those albums, and the cassette recorder, which I mentioned the other day in that Bowie rundown.

Labels: BBC, Dean Asker, Eurovision, Morrissey, MYMU

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DSC00005
Originally uploaded by Thoroughly Good.

The 'Morrissey for Eurovision' rumours are buzzing around again. Only this time, there's some substance to the story. It's been on News 24, with the lovely Paddy O'Connell being interviewed, as shown by my friend Jon's thoroughly good photo of the office TV (above). (Thanks Jon.)

It may just be a quiet news day, but here's the story from the BBC, Orange, ESC Today and The Sun (with 'hilarious' mocked-up picture of Mozza in Buck's Fizz).

"The BBC says it is in talks with the singer to write and possibly perform a
track for this year's contest in May. But a spokeswoman for the corporation
warned "nothing is confirmed at the moment".

The BBC has approached several other high-profile acts as it tries to "up the ante on the calibre of artists" taking part in the annual competition, she added."

That obviously means that Radiohead are being held to their promise, made on Jonathan Ross's TV show in 2003, immediately after the Jemini débacle, to write a song for Eurovision. Doesn't it?

It's no secret that Morrissey's a big Eurovision fan, but would he actually do it? The BBC's announcement a few weeks ago that the UK's song would be chosen in March surprised nobody, but it was telling that it didn't mention Making Your Mind Up, leading to inevitable speculation that the process might be changed. The BBC doesn't have to have a contest at all. The UK could just do what some other countries do and select the artist and song internally, or pick the artist and allow the public to choose the song (as we have done before).

If, as is mooted by the BBC in their own news report, Morrissey writes a song for someone else, who could do it justice? A return for Sandie Shaw?! Be still, my beating heart! Nancy Sinatra? Has anyone else covered a Morrissey song apart from those two?

Here's the Morrissey video from last April for You Have Killed Me, which really gives the game away about his love of Eurovision:

Labels: BBC, Eurovision, Morrissey, MYMU, Paddy O'Connell

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