12 points from Greece. None from anywhere else.

It's quite possible that the worst singer AND the worst song of this year's Eurovision have been chosen already. Alex Panayi had a real chance of winning Eurovision with his song in last night's Cypriot final, but no. Cyprus chose a sixteen year-old girl who can't sing instead. Here's the evidence:

Eurovision 2009: Cyprus - 'Firefly' - Christina Metaxa



Nine of us watched the Cypriot final last night. That song was joint last with me and possibly in everyone else's bottom two as well.

Labels: Cyprus, Eurovision 2009

· link

Cyprus - 'Femme Fatale' - Evdokia Kadi

We wrote about this when it was picked, so no need to waste time doing it again. It's no better now than it was in January. Cyprus and Greece have been separated into different semi-finals by the cunning EBU, so not even the Greeks can vote for this. It may get a smattering of points from the few nearby countries in the same semi, but this has no hope. If it makes the final I will eat my own eyes. (Possibly.)

This isn't the performance which won the Cypriot final. It's the interval performance from the Greek final, which came later. I find the song is improved greatly if you sing, "Oompa, loompa, doompa-dee-da" over the top of it.

Labels: Cyprus, Eurovision 2008

· link

We mentioned it once (back in November) but I think we got away with it. However, the self-imposed moratorium on mentioning it has now ended, so I would now like to declare the Eurovision season officially open! Some of you may now wish to look away until about 26th May.

We had our first gathering of the season on Saturday, to watch the Cypriot final and the first Danish semi-final. The good people of Cyprus decided that, even with only three countries’ songs for this year chosen and in the public domain so far, there is clearly not enough unintentional comedy heading for Belgrade, so they decided to make Cyprus this year’s laughing stock. To this end, they have chosen well. The song they picked on Saturday is destined to end up a long way short of qualifying for the final. The song, Femme Fatale, is the second in a row from Cyprus with a French title. However, unlike last year’s Comme Ci, Comme Ca from Evridiki, it’s not in French. It was, in fact, the only song in the Cypriot final in Greek, which probably had a lot to do with it being picked, and the fact that it's in a musical style which is very obviously going to appeal to a domestic audience. That's the problem though; its appeal won't travel much further afield than Cyprus and Greece.

There was a very interesting song called Moments of Madness, but unfortunately Cyprus had some and picked the wrong song. 'Femme Fatale' is a dog's dinner of a song/cabaret act, which can't make its mind up what song it wants to be and will end up near the bottom of the pile, no matter where it is drawn in one of the new semi-finals.

Watching the Cypriot final at B+K's, I wrote these notes on my scoresheet after watching 'Femme Fatale':

"Slow start, then v. Greek + v. gay. A mess. 4/10"

But when it came to our voting, I was laughing out loud, as I found myself giving a song that I'd described as "a mess" eight points, because the selection was so poor that only two were better. (Moments of Madness was by far the best choice, I thought.)

Here is the Cypriot winner. Please bear in mind that this is not a medley of former Cypriot favourites. It's just the one song, apparently.



Here are the other three songs destined for Beograd which have been revealed (Switzerland and half of Andorra's) or chosen (Albania) so far.

Do we already have the winner, from Switzerland? Or is a song in Italian never going to break through again? It's certainly damn good and he's not ugly either. Your comments are welcome.

Switzerland - 'Era Stupendo' - Paolo Meneguzzi



Albania - 'Zemren e lame peng' - Olta Boka



Andorra - 'Casanova' (audio only) - Gisela

Labels: Albania, Andorra, Cyprus, Eurovision 2008, Switzerland

· link