World of Chig   

8.5.03

02 – Austria - Weil Der Mensch Za:hlt (Man Is The Measure Of All Things) – Alf Poier
If we’d been watching the Austrian contest live, instead of on video three weeks after it actually happened, we’d have laughed (a little) at this and said, oh well, there’s always one, now let’s get on with the songs. But no, we already knew that this had won. I’d already tried to read the lyric on Alf's website (but failed to understand it, as it’s in a non-standard dialect of German), and yet….and yet…it still seemed unbelievable. But none of the other artists or the presenters seemed in the slightest bit embarrassed that this man is about to bring shame and mockery on O:sterreich on a scale unknown since Jorg Haider. And that’s because it’s really funny. If you’re Austrian. Or you’ve read the lyric. So, expect a few votes from the fringes of Germany, none from Switzerland (as they’re not in it this year) and some ironic votes from the UK, and that may be it. However, if lots of people get the joke, and vote for it for a laugh, it could actually do as well as Guildo in 1998. Try listening to this and NOT singing, “You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy, when skies are grey.” My friend Andy reckons you can also sing Hey Jude over the top, but I have yet to try.

Millions of people around Europe have now turned off their TVs, muttered 'same old rubbish every year' and gone to the pub. Those who get back in time for the reprise (in reverse order), will only see this again followed by Iceland. Being drunk, they will think it's really funny and will vote for it, making it win. Possibly.

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