So...

...there we almost have it. Seven tears have flown into the river...(Huh? What is this guy on?)…and seven weeks have passed since we started our journey. At least two of our number one hitmakers have departed this Earth and gone to the great jukebox in the sky since we started, and there have unfortunately been other casualties along the way, not just Lonnie Donegan and Jam Master Jay. My social life and my Guinness Book of 500 Number One Singles have both fallen apart quite dramatically. I’m jesting. Such unnecessary melodrama (but it’s true about the book – fallen apart from the spine it has, into several pieces, after too much thumbing).

Now there’s just one day to go until the singles chart is 50 years old, and one more number one to come in our chart, but by the Lord Lloyd-Webber, what could it be? Which record could possibly have come top in a poll of you, my beloved readers, friends and family? Some of the obvious contenders have gone already – Bohemian Rhapsody and Imagine for example. Is it another Abba track? Another Kylie track? Another Madonna track? Or a one hit wonder we haven’t mentioned yet? Was the artist on TV last night? Where the hell are the Beatles and their 17 chart-toppers? What about the Spice Girls and Westlife, who have had twenty #1s between them, but haven’t been seen here yet? Surely there must be a proper Elvis single? Or could it be that the winner comes from the last dance at the end of the school disco? Is it the Greek bloke being reckless with his chocolate bar? Would we be swigging a fizzy drink, or pulling on a pair of jeans as we sing along? Does it have anything to do with the BBC’s Great Britons? Is it another disco stormer? Or a sixties singalong? Or, at the other end of the spectrum, is it some ancient rock classic? Is it a record so controversial that it appeared in some people’s ‘worst number ones’ list? Or is it a universally acknowledged classic? Or neither? Where’s Al Martino? It’s his fault we’re here, after all! Am I asking too many questions? Why? How Much Is That Doggie In The Window? Why Do Fools Fall In Love? Whatever, all that’s left is the number one. Place your bets….NOW! Will you still love me tomorrow?.....
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