Australia does it again!

Australian gold medals in Salt Lake City are seemingly (CLICHÉ ALERT!) like buses for the Aussies. You go for XVIII Winter Olympiads (that’s eighteen in real language) with no gold medals whatsoever, ever, ever. And then TWO turn up at once, and the nation can hardly believe its luck, even if no one had ever heard of the athletes, or even their sports, before this week. No matter. Steven Bradbury and Alisa Whatsername(?) are in severe danger of becoming national heroes if they’re not careful. Bradbury already had a congratulatory TV ad in his honour last night from one of the banks sponsoring the TV coverage. This success has caused a slight problem for Roy and HG though. The two guys who we only really know in the UK for their bloody awful ‘tickle it, you wrigglers’ Foster’s ads are a national institution over here, and in fact they are much more likeable, and funny, than I had thought. Their nightly TV show during the 2000 Sydney Olympics was apparently much better than the official coverage, and they were even allowed to brighten up the General Election results night in October with a live show! Imagine the Dimblebys being replaced by French & Saunders back home. Just wouldn’t happen, would it?

Roy and HG are currently on every night on Channel Seven, straight after the formal Olympic coverage, broadcasting from a log cabin in SLC, with a live audience, and surrounded each day by a table-load of whatever nasty American snackfood that they’ve picked up locally. The original idea was obviously to take the piss out of sports that Aussies can’t do very well, but now they’ve won two events, they just can’t help stirring up a bit of national pride too. They have interviews with the athletes – the ones who have finished their events at least – including a very funny one with a US two-man luge team. They show all the mistakes, falls and accidents of the day. They add their own commentary to whole ice-skating routines, taking the piss out of the Swiss ice dance pair (the Hugentoblers?) who are brother and sister, saying they have to act out being in love for the routine and they hope it wasn’t real, etc etc. But most importantly, they have launched Australia’s bid to host the Winter Olympics in 2010. Now I’ve never heard of Smiggin Holes, but the name is so ridiculous that I suspect it’s actually a real place. I also suspect that, if it’s where they say it is on the Aussie map (ie. in the middle), it’s one of the hottest, driest places on Earth, but no matter. Roy and HG have the logo, and as of two nights ago, they have 13,000 volunteers for 2010 who have signed up on their recruitment hotline.

Best of all though is the weather report just before the break. Each day, they persuade some hapless foreign presenter to stand in front of an easel in the snow, and present the next day’s weather for Australia. Only problem is that the map, which clearly shows Smiggin Holes, isn’t entirely accurate, although M did have to point out to me that Brisbane was on the wrong side of the country before I fully appreciated this joke.
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